let's think of a 12 step plan

[Senna]

I think we should all think of a 12 step plan for those who are going through a broken heart...does anyone have any ideas as to how it should start?

 

I think it will be really good for everyone going through this

[daredevil]

I have some ideas... on how to get the ex back... [own experience]

 

1. The first rule of all is not to beg, plead or ask for mercy... don't show the ex regrets, instead show the person that your moving on with your lives....

 

2. U start the nc rule... and hereby u start doing social activites and other kind of activities which gets your mind of your ex.. Hanging out with friends, attending gym, talk more to your parents, spend more time on homework (or ordinary work), partying, meeting new people and of course focusing your mind of every kind of thing which can keep your busy!

 

3. During the nc where you start to do this things you could also start to see new people, and no I don't refer to the socalled rebound effect, where you get together with a new person in order to forget your ex... this only hurts a new person, and we don't want that to happen

 

4. If you ever have the chance of being near some of your ex's friends, family or the ex in own person, then show that your moving on by of course being nice and gentle if they contact you, but also at the same time be a little busy meaning that... if the ex is the first person to contact you, then you should be a little available but also at the same time be less available.. get a balance between being there for her... and at the same time keep busy so the ex canøt depend on you as earlier...

 

5. The 4 above mentioned things takes time, and during this time you could also spend time studying the body language of the sex you dealing with.. for instance if its a girl then read body language.. and how to read 'em books... and of course the other way around... by reading and studying these thinfs you will perhaps be able to recognize problems which earlier happened in the relationship, or perhaps recognize the feelings shown by the ex...

 

6. Start dating people more in order to show your ex that you have moved on.. and that you furtheremore once again has become this independent person, which the ex once fell in love with

 

7. If she at this time being has initated contact to you and showed regrets and such things... then now is the time to show some affection and be more for her there.... But still... keep a little busy and don't show her too much feelings indicating you want the ex back.. In most situations it has to be the dumper who has to show that regrets exists.. you should play it cool and let the ex do the wanting back thing.. then from here we're are talking the real stuff....

 

8. At this point when you have become much nearer to her and you two are talking again, then i suggest that you perhaps start talking to her about the exes daily life at school, work, at home or for instance with friends.. don't bring up topics as perhaps the ex's new boyfriend or your past relationship with your ex.... Avoid that, but still focus on being there for her.. and open up more and more and tell her the things u want her to tell also... so we experience a flowing contact from person to person...

 

9. At this point you two should be talking nice.. and still you have to keep doing activites.. NEVER GIVE UP your "new" life just because you have initated contact with ´the ex... keep doing these activites and hang out with friends and date... but also give the ex more space and more of your spare time.. in order to achieve what you want, you always have to stay focused on that if she doesn't come back then life goes on....

 

 

I need more ideas only 9 points so far