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Out of the Blue

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So it's been about 10 1/2 weeks since the breakup and today Out of the Blue she calls me to 'talk' and see what I've been up to. At first it took me about 2 minutes to figure out who the heck was calling because I didn't recognize her voice or know her new number and I gave her my number like a month ago, in case she "needed" to talk. We just casually kind of talked (half an hour) and I asked her how her and her bf were and supposedly they were going to get an apartment together but they broke up. Which is probably why she was calling me. She had tried to get ahold of me the past two weeks but I just ignored her e-mails.



Now it was really nice to hear her voice and she said she missed me but I didn't reply with an "I miss you too" but the truth is I do. The past week I've been missing her immensely even last night I went on a date with a girl who had her same birthdate. It was weird, I guess she picked up on the "now I'm dating" vibes and decided to get in touch with me.


I don't plan on calling her back just erased the number from my caller id and now I'm trying to move on but...I'm just trying!


It's so hard we were together for five years and she told me her sister myspaced me (haven't logged in in a month) telling me I could go over and visit her because they really miss me. I miss them too, I do.


God this sucks.


I almost started crying on the phone...but I didn't. I told her it wasn't healthy for us to be talking so casually. She told me this wasn't eternal sunshine and she just can't erase me from her mind.


In my heart I want her but my head does not and I will have to be wise because my heart will just get broken again, not like she'a asking for reconciliation or anything.


Oh gosh I'm rambling, sorry. This has helped getting all this out.


The past 10 1/2 weeks have been a real challenge the last 4 weeks weren't so hard, but this past week has been really hard, have really been missing her, and what do you know she tells me the same. If she really wanted me she would run around the world twice, naked. For me.




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Little Lady, Sorry for what she put you through but I think she wants you to chase her. She needs some serious counseling and help. Continue to think that being free of her is worse than having her back in your life. Normally people say dump her number, email, and everything else that reminds you of her, but I would say keep it so this time you know who is calling you. You deserve better.

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Thanks for the advice guys, I seriously think she does need therapy. I went on her myspace today and just laughed. It says she's still in a relationship and her 'ex' is telling her that he wishes he could kiss her, he sent that today. Also this week is when he left (she lives out of state) so no wonder she was trying to contact me so many times. It all makes sense.


What a bucket full of lies, makes me glad I'm not with her.

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