Jump to content

Going to be starting a long distance relationship


Recommended Posts

As you can see from over there (

 

About a two months ago I started going out with my girlfriend, and we have been getting along very well, she is going to Florida State, in Tallahassee FL. We both really like each other and are getting along well, and we have barely talked about when we will have to leave.

 

I know we will need to discuss it before we leave, but I don't know what to say, or what to do, or what I should have in mind for the future. I want to keep the relationship going while we are separated, but I know its not fair to ask her to wait. Is it even feasible for us to have a long distance relationship so young? We would see each other during the school breaks (spring, winter), and its unlikely much more then that. She has already said that she "doesn't want to lose me," but we have not talked about it, only mentioned it in conversation.

 

I would appreciate any advice or words of wisdom.

Link to comment

A long distance relationship is REALLY hard to do.

 

I used to have one going, and I kept getting jealous whenever she talked about a boy.

 

So I think jealousy is the biggest problem..

 

Feeling jealous about them being close to her, and you´re not.

 

But if you can cope with that, then DEFINITELY keep contact going, preferably talk together every day..

 

both meaningfull and mindless conversations, as long as you talk together.

 

And at every time possible, go see eachother.

 

That would definitely be my advise.

Link to comment

your situation is a bit different than mine... but some of the same rules apply. If you care enough for each other, a long-distance-relationship might be possible... but keep in mind that you both will be doing a lot of growing in college... and growing TOGETHER while you are apart is hard to do sometimes... it will take a lot of effort and trust and ESPECIALLY communication!!! you will HAVE to talk to each other very very candidly about your relationship... no matter if it makes you both feel uncomfortable... or even angry/frustrated

 

so yea it's feasible, but it won't always be fun... and it will take a LOT of work for both of you. also, you'll realize how much you miss each other when you see each other again after your first break.... that might help your perspective a bit.

 

and both of you need to talk about this openly and honestly... you've only been dating for two months and you ARE young... so you might want to tread cautiously here... know that it's possible... but there is always a price to pay.

 

Hope this is semi-useful to you

Link to comment

Guys and girls, I share all of your feelings. I am currently in a long distance realtionship with a girl whom I love very much. Believe it or not, we met on the internet and then in person (we live in the same state and going to the same college soon so why not). We have known each other for about 8 or 9 months but a week and a half physically. I am in the army and stationed in Korea and been here for more than a year already. I met her while on leave. In any case, yes it is a hard thing to do but she is strong and I think she is worth the wait. We talk on the phone and through e-mail and instant messengers. It keeps our love alive and we learn alot more about each other. Her parents already like me and she sees that as an avantage so she says she'll wait for me. The point I am trying to get accross to you guys is that if your love is strong, it will remain. Long distance is powered by patience, love, and hope. They are your best friends and I believe all of you can make it happen. But that's not to say that bad things won't happen.....not much you can do about that.

Link to comment

I just tell it how it is man. Inspiration is required for a situation like this. I give advice based on the situation. And plus I feel your pain because I am THOUSANDS of miles away from my lil pookie. Just hang in there man and everything will be fine.

Link to comment

I know how you feel man believe me. And i won't be able to come back home for another 8 months! Then I have to come BACK to Korea for another 7 months! Then you got the possibility that they could send me to Iraq.... But, I am trying to keep my head up about all this. If I can do it, you can too because I am not a very emotinally strong person. I hate suffering but I know that me and her will be together again. Hang in there my friend, good things come to those who wait and you will have your time.

Link to comment

First off, thanks to both of you for being in (or going to be in) the armed services...I always wished I had joined, but couldn't get myself to do it....

 

LDR's are tough...but they work out more than people lead on...

 

One of my old fraternity brothers has been dating a girl for 5 years...long distance the whole time...they see each other as much as they can and it works for them...

 

Me and my ex broke up over the LDR because she wasn't emotionally stong enough to miss me...

 

Believe me two people can be very much in love and not have it work out...but at the sametime in very well can work out....

 

 

Must's for LDR's.... Love, Patience, Trust, and Communication...with these four things you can very easily make it work out...

Link to comment

The best advice I can give you bud is to break it off as soon as possible. I tried to maintain a relationship with my ex when I left for the service and it only worked for so long. Air Force Academy is going to be the toughest challenge you've ever faced and shes going to be nothing but dead weight on you. Besides there are so many hot girls there dude that your going to be glad your single. Shes also going to be meeting alot of guys in FSU I've been there. Your young and you need to do new things. I wished I would have made that decision before I left for the service. It wont be easy but doing the right thing rarely is. You two really need to talk about it. Odds are it wont work out. But there sometimes is a certain few who can pull it off. Good luck.

Link to comment

As someone who is entering a long distance relationship at the end of this summer, my advice to you would be to enjoy each other as much as you can this summer, even though it hurts when you think about what might happen at the end. Make sure you don't have regrets when you two go to your different destinations. If you have a good time in the summer it will make your relationship strong enough for the LDR to work. Practical advice would include making sure that you both have AIM, also worth thinking about would be a webcam and/or a cell phone with a free long distance plan.

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Well tomrrow I leave (and will not be back on the fourms for a bit) and I had to say goodby to the woman I love.

 

My god it hurts.

 

Its been over 1/2 hr, i'm still crying and i know she is to. All I want to do is hold her in my arms, to love her.

 

My god it hurts.

Link to comment
  • 2 weeks later...

Well hope you guys stay together......my long distnace relationship didn't fare so well. But it just wasn't the fact we was far apart, there were other aspects to it.....but a word of wisdom, make for sure that your parter is ready for a relationship of any kind or you will be greeted with a nasty surprise....like I did.

Link to comment
  • 4 months later...

Hey all,

 

Well for anyone who is around who was following my relationship woes... we are still together. I'm up at the academy and life here is.... well lets leave it at that. I'm going to be disenrolling soon and going home, we spent almost 6months apart and I think it actually did some good. We saw each other every three months so It wasn't compleatly no contact. We stayed in touch over the phone quite a bit and generally didn't fight too often.

 

I will be attending FSU in the spring semester.. Hopfully I'll get back into these boards.

Link to comment

oh, wow. ^^; lucky~ =) I thought you might have to go in the military right after this, but you're going to school first. ^_^ That's good. Hopefully the war will end before you come out of college. Are you signed up for reserve or active duty afterwards?

Link to comment

join laaater. I haven't heard much about the air force, but the army/marine/navy deployments are all really stressing friends, families, and the armed forces out. They're long and way too uncertain especially when someone enters a hot zone. If you join later you might save your girlfriend and yourself some of the dramas that some people are going through. ^^:

Link to comment
  • 1 year later...

i am just starting a long distance relationship this year. I am 18 years old and have been with my boyfriend for a year. He has just left for edinburgh university and i will be going down to southampton university, (as far away from eachother as possible) I have never been happier in my life than when im with him. We are both certain that staying together is what we want to do. however, i just spoke to him at uni and he was with a girl from my old school. Its not that im worried about him cheating, i know its not in him to cheat. I just got really jelous that she was with him, able to look at him and touch him. while i am miles away on my own. sounds crazy probably. Anyway were planning to see each other once a month, so i know its not as long as some people have managed, still im nervous, im used to living with him and now i get to share a bed with him one or two nights a month, its hard. Any advice for taking my mind off it would be much appreciated. No break up advice please! sable x

Link to comment
  • 3 months later...

Wow this post is ancient! Sorry I didn't see it in time, i just relized somone posted here becasue I was looking up another of my old posts.

 

Sorry I don't have any advice... except that it would not have been worth it at that point in my life to continue a long distance relationship. I ended up leaving the academy for other reasons and joined her in college.

 

Currently we are not dating tho. Were together for 2.5years.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...