pupaloo

Hello! I recently went back on them. I felt like I was drowning everyday. I was being very negative towards my husband. (He doesn't care much about his health and I am bitter about it). I was on them a long while back and after about a year or so I thought I was strong enough to not need them.. I found out I was wrong. They help me with my mood and help me cope with my negative thinking habit, and I think it is just that, a habit. I also listen to audio books about behavioral techniques. I have accepted that I may be on these for many years... I am more and more okay with that...

Thank you all for your words. I sometimes feel like it will take something very severe for him to make A change, not completely change because I know he would not do that. I have told him I am all about baby steps. I will be and have been his biggest cheerleader.. I have told him this...I know any progress is good progress....but consistency is what will make the difference.

He is good about going to his doctor visits and checkups. He sees a cardiologist every 6 months and the pulmonary visits yearly. He is good about taking "all of his meds" daily. It's just the hard work of exercise and better eating that goes along with better health that he doesn't do.....Can't help one if you don't help the other...

I am not taking it personally...I appreciate what you say... Thank you

Yes, but I will admit that I have bought junk food for him too. Sometimes I feel that if he doesn't care why should I so I get him some... Feeding the problem......I know it is wrong. It feels like parenting sometimes.. Giving in to make a situation tolerable for a while, and I know that is wrong too.... After being married all of these years, I go day by day.. Some may say that it makes me part of the "problem"...

Without sounding selfish, after being married for all of these years, and seeing the cycle that he has conditioned himself to live in....eating poor no exercise, then trying to eat better and a tiny bit of exercise then after a week or so he falls back into the old habit....habits are easier to live by then break....

I am not saying that what I or your Aunt went thru or are going thru is common in marriages but, I see it a lot. I ask my husband a few times a week if he wants to walk and he says no. I try again another day. Somedays I try hard to not be a nag and then somedays I just can't keep my mouth closed.. I guess because after hearing doctors tell him the same thing over and over about his health....I sometimes feel that it is just something I cannot help try to remedy if he doesn't want too.

He does walk around our property but not all of the time. I am all for changes, but it has to be for the long term. He will try to eat better for awhile then falls back into what I think is his habit, eating bad and no exercise.

I do travel with my friends, and I go out to events and dinners and shopping with them. I have the best friends in the world and I am very grateful for them. My husband will make comments sometimes about me going so many places with them and I ignore the comments and go anyway. I kinda feel like he would be happy if I was just like him..

I have not been on this site for a very, very long time. Hello to everyone! I have been married for over 40 years. My husband is good to me and I love him. He has provided a very nice life for me.....however.......and here comes the selfish sounding part....he is very, very overweight and has health problems that are hindering our retirement years.. I am not a physically fit person by any means but I do exercise and watch what I eat. He will go places with me, like the beach and stuff but all he will do is sit in the condo and watch tv or sit in a lounge chair outside. The only time he likes to really go anywhere is when we go out to eat. He is not trying at all to help get his health better. It is a topic that has been discussed over and over again with me and his doctors.. He is on meds for depression & anxiety attacks, and is being treated for COPD and heart problems. I am finding myself angry and irritated all of the time because he just doesn't seem to care anymore.