selkie

A male friend of mine has freaked me out.

I know he is STILL pining over his ex. I asked him how many days of NC.

521 days he told me. And he STILL talks theoretically about them getting back together and having kids.

Hmm I think he needs to stop counting and move on.

Day 22

 

So mad right now I could scream.

You need to find a couple of other men to focus on.

I think you're dwelling on him all your waking hours.

Plenty of people have bumped up old threads...it helps to read the stories of others even if they haven't happened recently...the point is, they still happened and you can learn from them. That is why we always learn about history...I mean, one can argue, why learn about World War I when that was long ago, why not just learn about the wars that happened in the last few years...because there are lessons to be learned from previous wars....and so, there are lessons to be learned from older threads.

Found it amusing cause it was a 1 page thread.

lol

If the topic is still relevant.. why not?

Seems kinda curious when it's a topic that comes up all time. LOL

I think the most NC ive had with my ex has been 13 days. I called her on her bday and since then she has been messaging me once a week, thursdays.

Oh any reason you bumped a 3 year old thread ?

Went 10 days and now I failed. Ex contacted me with emails and pictures tonight and I gave in and emailed him back.

I was polite, not gushing and let him know Ill be away for business trip for a good while. Vague, but sitll broke contact. ARGH.

DO OVER.

This reminds me of my 1st boner encounter.

I was so damn pure that in 9th grade I was at a dance and this senior who was 6'5 (i was and am 5'5) was slow dancing against me and i thought he was rudely pushing against my stomach with his lower arm.

Hahahaha. It wasnt an arm.

I LOVE that this thread is over 3 years old.

I bet if I come back here in 15 years it will still be going.

Anyway, the only guy who didnt get a boner kissing me made me think he was GAY.

This was a guy I dirty danced in front of all night and who had tol dme how sultry and hot I am.

Turns out he was a whiskey d1ck.

I ABSOLUTELY dont want my back, but I still understand how hard it is to resist them when they attempt contact.

I thought it would be easy but its hard .... I ignored his increasingly frantic IMs tonight, but it was so painful to not give in and say Hi back.

Thats why I will reiterate for the millionth time the two best means of maintaining no contact.

1. Shutting down all avenues of contact.

2. Keeping insanely busy at all times.

fck fck fck fck gave in and let him IM him me.........ARGHGHRHGHRGHG

He had a great excuse . his sister is back from Iraq.

Dammit....

But again I know how much he cares and misses me at least.

Alright I have to sign offline.

I am calm in my continued no contact. I know he wants to get back together but I can not attempt it until I live in same city.

Which will be a little under 3 months from now.

I am calm because I know him well enough to know how he reacted to past serious break ups.

He let me know he tried to move on and would become preoccupied with girls who ignored him cold.

So I know this is the very best course of action.

might read thiscc

change of circumstances

Another thing that may be of a concern to a man if you tell him the things you have posted about on here is that you may want him just as a father to your children and to be there to support you while you look after them. Most men want to be loved for themselves rather than for what they can provide. So be careful that you don't project that if that is not what you mean. And I agree that a follow on from that may be concern about having to pay alimony in the event of a divorce - the risk is quite high statistically speaking.

. change of circumstances

I highly respect any woman who chooses to do that, despite people ( sorry!) like your friends who put them down for their choices.

 

I think its one of the most important jobs a woman can do..

 

A woman going out and working and sending her kids for someone else to take care of?!?! (while paying that woman or daycare some minimu wage?!?!)

I think thats horrible!

For some reason my friends think that either women who stay at home are 1. boring. 2. objectified and repressed 3. boring, objectified and repressed.

We've had some heated arguments about it and I give up trying to stick up for SAHM.

 

I'd rather spend my money on DOING things rather than BUYING things.. some people can do both... great if they can.. but if i only have option.. I'd rather just rent a cheap ole' apartment... go off and do things.

 

Your possessions, things, houses can burn down, money can be lost.. but no one can take away who you are and no one can take away your experiences.

That's an awesome viewpoint. Thanks !

I don't know - you sound like quite a catch to me, and probably every sane man out there. It sounds like you are doubting yourself. why?

not best to discloe

I don't necessarily think you should wait until Mr. Right comes along to buy a home. If you want one, go for it! I bought my home, and i love it. do whatever will make you happiest.

I've actually already owned a condo. It was old so seemed to always have a lot of upkeep. The profits I made when I sold it went into investments.

I was thinking of buying a house but my two single female friends have and it's been one big "Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream Home" snafu after another for them too.

It would be great if I was handier around the house but Im not hence repairs involved hefty amount of bucks. lol

well I dont' really care about a guy's investments, property or how much he earns.. and so I wouldn't want a guy who thinks that hightly of that kind of thing.

 

I could be wrong.. but it sounds like those things are important to you? I man.. you talk about how much $$ you have in investments and how much you earn.. so I assume you are looking for a guy who that kind of thing is important to as well?

No not really Im as happy shopping at Target as I am at Saks.

I'm easily entertained by simple things in life.

not valid anymore

Insight please !

Why are you still talking to this guy? Why haven't you blocked him already?

Oh he's blocked..He had a second email he used to send me stuff when I blocked the first one. Now thats blocked too.

I've decided he's not only sleazy, he is also kinda deranged too.

Easy to run away from him now.

Thanks for your kind words btw.

Oh my lord. I have to block his email right now.

He actually is trying to make me feel bad......

He emailed me that he is very hurt right now because the last girl he dated was a "total psycho" and thanks a lot to me for upsetting him with my freak out.

Uh-huh.

Have you had conversations similar to that in the past that were joking around?

Not at all.

And I wasn't aware that he had a sense of humor.

Not a joking around kind of a guy.

I think he was merely deflecting his inappropriate request.

Anyway, I'm certain I will never ever hear from him again.

So his reply to my email was that he was totally kidding and did not mean it at all. I looked over the IM logs. He seemed dead serious.

Oh good Lord above what is wrong with me ?

I just composed and sent the MF an email ..........

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