Pegasus

I figure that is the only way to help get over them, i was once told that for every month you were together it takes a week to get over. For me that means another 17 weeks, but for me also that means another 17 weeks of hell and im doing anything and everything i can do to help get over him, Im reading books about moving on, im on here and honestly hearing that there are so many people who are going through this months and even years after they broke up is actually giving me some motivation.

Kate,

don't count on that time limit. Everyone heals different and has different timeline. It's not how long relationship was going on - it's more what this relationship meant to you and how deeply were you in love. Don't make time assumptions - you'll be pretty disappointed when it does not "end" when you expect it. Everyday it will be a bit easier (maybe you will not notice it - specially at the start of it). I've noticed (I'm 5 months after BU of 3,5 years relationship) that first month or two, actually thing were getting worse, but they started to be better. I had a setback on sunday (saw my ex kissing a guy she let me for) but now I'm better. It will pass. It will take it's time but it will pass.

Just keep going...

Okie

On Friday, November 30th at 9:00 pm go out and gaze.

Ahmmm... November 30th is Thursday. Anyway, a very good words, doya. Maybe would be good to do it both on Thursday and Friday. I will add my story soon since I went through similar stuff (and still going through) so it may show you all it will get better.

Okie

I want to die, I hate this

Hi D,

I know it sucks - i'm in pretty same sh*t as you are right now. My situation is even worse - she left me for another guy and was seeing him at least a month before our BU. Guess what - I saw them kissing yesterday on the street. But, you know, life goes on. I would really like to go 6 months back but it just can't be done and we have to face it what is in front of us. At this moment it sucks. I don't know what did I wanted to say in the first place, but want you to know that you're not the only person feeling bad at this moment. Hopefully it will be a bit easier for you. Those things happen - sometimes for no reason.

Keep your head up it will get better. It must...

Okie

Yeah, a disturbing thing you will notice if you continue to have contact with your ex is that he will try to put the blame on you for his own lack of integrity. I hate to tell you this, but when people do something crappy to someone else, they often will do or say anything to avoid feeling guilty. It's amazing the lengths some people will go to in order to avoid facing their own mistakes and bad behavior. Even if that involves essentially telling someone else, "You made me do it!"

Oh God my ex told me exactly the same after leaving me for another guy she was seeing at least a month before our BU. The thing is - I feel guilty because she said that

Okie

Dako,

so you say you could be a friend after BU with someone who cheated on you and that is just about maturity?

Okie

Dear Giutarman,

We all learn from our mistakes and that is just the way it is. It is pretty painfull way, I know (I had very similar situation), but you can't turn back time. What's done is done. Maybe you'll have another chance with this same girl, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll find another as good as her or even better. Who knows. It just says you weren't ready at a time she was. It happens. Nothing to blame yourself about.

Okie

Hi GUitarmanIII,

it's not a big deal to break the NC. The thing is, you'll probably break it a few more times until your brain does not definitely understand that contacting her is too painfull. I know that - I did it myself a few times, but now I'm on NC for 39 days and don't even want to contact her anymore at all. The only contact we will have if she's the one that does contacting. You'll be just fine, don't worry too much. It will go away in time. It just must ;-).

Okie

Hi GuitarmanIII,

it's nothing to worry about. I was going through this stage first few weeks. It will get a bit better soon with your sleep.