Chet777

I was in a very similar situation as you. However, my wife always said she never found women attractive and was 100% heterosexual when the subject came up. She started a friendship with a younger female who was in a abusive relationship with her boyfriend. This friend was bisexual and found women more attractive even though she was with a man. I noticed a change in my wife's behavior as their friendship grew. She started bringing up lesbian relationships of people she knew and would make a passing comment on the attractiveness of random women. Of course she would also say just because she thinks a woman looks attractive doesnt mean she is sexually attracted to women. And how women need to have friendships with other women because they provide something that men can not. She started spending more and more time with her friend which included hiding the amount of times she would see her. She would constantly text this women throughout the day while becoming more secretive and guarding her phone. My intuition knew something was wrong. One day her friend called and she left the room to take the call. I walked by the room she was in and her my wife say that she wished I would accept their "relationship". When I confronted her about what I'd heard she said she means friendship with this woman. I thought to myself if that was the case why not just say friendship. Later they went on a girl's weekend together to the beach and I found out they slept in the same bed together (the place they stayed in had two bedrooms). My intuition was screaming that they were having an affair and when I finally brought this up my wife told me nothing was going on and I was insecure and jumping to conclusions. After more disturbing behavior I realized my wife was never going to be honest with me I decided to buy spy software and installed it on my wife's phone. It didn't take long for me to find sexual messages between them which included references to times they had sex. I confronted my wife with this information and she said she was lonely and I didn't satisfy her in the bedroom in the most insulting and hurtful way possible. I felt like I didn't know who this person was and wasted decades of my life being with them. When I told her I wanted a divorce and never wanted to speak to her again she begged me not to leave her and that it wasn't a big deal because she didn't sleep with another man. I tried marriage counseling because I loved her but in the end the level of betrayal and how she made me feel was too much for me to handle and I filed for divorce. I know you are afraid but you need to come to the realization that your marriage is over. Your wife is in love with another person. You deserve to be in a relationship with someone who is in love with you and who is sexually attracted to you.