ADent42

Communication is key to any relationship. You say you can't afford therapy (understandable), so you two need to figure this out by yourselves. You two need to start somewhere - maybe try to agree on a day/time every week when you can spend an hour (or whatever) together talking. The main thing, though is that you should be able to discuss your wants and needs with each other. Expressing these things is not an argument (or it shouldn't be), and you both need to try to be engaged, committed and avoid defensiveness, anger, bitterness, accusations or anything else that would escalate these talks beyond what is productive or into an argument. The goal is that you both feel comfortable and safe bringing up issues, discussing your feelings (good and bad) and figuring things out together. I don't know if this is helpful at all. You both need to be open and honest and coming at these discussions from a place of love and understanding and empathy. It's not easy, but you both need to be on the same page.

A person "just being friendly" isn't going to go out of their way to be around you. She's eating lunch with you - she's choosing to spend time with you. It's not a guarantee that she's got a crush on you, but she wants to be around you, that's clear. When she asks you questions, try to relax and have a conversation. If she comments on you seeming nervous you can just tell her you're shy - nothing wrong with that. Try to relax and just be yourself - or a more outgoing, personable version of yourself - as much as possible. Just try to get to know her and don't weigh yourself down with overthinking things or placing expectations on everything that happens. She clearly wants to be around you, so just try to have some confidence and be yourself. Don't put any romantic pressure on these interactions - think of her as a coworker and a friend. Get to know her, get more comfortable around her. Best of luck.