Tiffany1981

My 63 year old mother is now cursing me out for no reason and wants nothing to do with me all because she can’t have her way with my money . Just to give a little context my mother is 63 years old, she shares a home in Houston with my youngest sister who is 30 years old . For the last several years , my youngest sister and mother have lived together dispite not being able to get along civally . In the past , whenever either one of them was in a tight spot and needed help . I would help . I have helped with everything helping them avoid homelessness by helping pay electric bills , past rent bills when my mother hours was reduced . They eventually ended up getting evicted from there last apartment ,which I gave to them , when they came to live with me back in 2014, they both ended up living a shelter and I had them come stay with me . After a year , I ended up moving out of state and leaving them my apartment which they kept up until 2023 , where they both got evicted for non payment ,so They both became homeless , I stepped in and helped because my youngest sister who was working at the time did not have enough money to help with an hotel and my mother hours were reduced . So I found this rental house , and loaned them the 1500.00 dollars needed to get the house. And while the house was being prepped , I helped pay for her and my sister an airbnb for a month while the house was getting ready , sent them money for food and transportation this all was happening while I was married , so of course at the time , I had more free money at the time . Then a month later , my brother and his baby mama was getting into it , so he became homeless and left Kansas City to move to Houston to move in with my mother and sister . Once he moved in , every day , my mother is calling me complaining about my brother not helping out , not cleaning up behind himself , cursing him out , arguments daily , so she put him out a week later in the middle of a Texas summer . With literally has nowhere to go . So to help him out , I paid for him an airbnb for two months , sent him money for food and gas while he tries to look for work . Paid for his car to get fixed He eventually moved back to Kansas City with his baby mamba a few months later . Now, once my brother leaves , my youngest sister decides to quit her job “due to her back issues” . She quits her job and decides she doesn’t want to work for a while . In the meantime She applies for unemployment , they deny her for about a month , so during this time I am helping her pay her portion of the rent , sending her money for food and gas , helping her with her resume etc . She eventually gets approved for unemployment , during this time , she looses her car due to not paying her car note , on top of that my mother and her are arguing every day over food , money , bills . Since my sister quit her job , my mother has had to pay the majority of the bills and so they are arguing every day over bills, food , her laziness and unwillingness to try and find a job , hygiene issues , etc , the list goes on . This morning around 3:09 am ,, my mother calls me crying hysterically telling me she and my sister were arguing and fighting because my sister did refuses to help clean and she went crazy and broke up things in the house. Now keep in mind they have been living together for the past 10 years , and they have had several arguments and fights to where they have broken up furniture , actually put hands on each other , called the police and tried to have each other arrested . So when I got this call , I just figured it was another argument . My mother is crying and begging me to let my sister come stay with me or pay for her an hotel , because my sister threatened her . I told her I cannot financially help as I just got out of a divorce and have my own bills . Plus I am really tired of everyone asking for me for money all the time !! . I am sick of it . I advise my mother to just evict my sister out the legall way and just leave her be until either she can evict my sister or move out herself . She gets mad at me and curses me out and tells me she never wants to talk to me again in life . I am literally heartbroken . I have been there for her and everyone else in every way possible and she had the audacity to be upset with me just because I won’t take my sister in or put her up in a hotel or arbnb . I literally am just appalled right now .

You are right

Nope , not at all . Just kinda feel bad for the guy because he doesn’t have anyone or anywhere to live .I don’t have those types of feelings for him anymore

Just a little update on my husband and I relationship . I posted on here several times about my Husband doing “Gods Work” by doing Uber / Lyft and how during his job he would flirt , sexting , and even on some occasions meeting up with some of his riders without my knowledge . Caught him sending money and buying gifts for different women On top of that , he would only paid the rent when he felt like it , did not help clean “expected me to Obey” on top of that had a secret life , where he wouldn’t introduce me to his family and stuff and lied about his background so ,. I finally garnered up the strength to finally leave him and divorce him back in January 2024. Part of the settlement , was that I give him the title to the car (2018 ) Nissan Altima and we leave without splitting any bank accounts or spousal support . I agree to the settlement and more !!Since , he had no place to go , I helped him put half the deposit down on an office space he could reside in, so that he wouldn’t have to be homeless . I even helped him buy a few suits and dress shoes , tolietries, I even took care of the maintenance on the car before I officially signed it over to him , so that he can really have a good fresh start and to help prepare himself and elevate his life . I moved to Houston as soon as the Divorce was filed . Soon thereafter he would call and check on me , then it turned into him calling asking me for financial help ! About a month ago , while driving for Lyft , he gets rear ended , he calls me up to ask me to help him with $1,000 dollars to help with the costs to fix the damage to the car . We get into an argument , and we both agree to file the claim against the person who hits him to fix the car .Yesterday , he reaches out again to let me know , he lost his job with Lyft for xesual harassment . This is the second job he has lost for “xesual harassment “ . He then starts to give me the SOB story about how now that he lost his job ,and now he only had 200.09 dollars to his name , and needs financial Help while he looks for a job . He goes on to say he wants to get back together to try to work on us , as he will now try to get a high paying job to take care of us , and really try to right by me this time around if I give him a chance . He even confided in me that he being around women is temptation for him , so he will need a job where he doesn’t work around a lot of women as that is a trigger for him . SMH

Just wanted to do a quick update ; a few days ago I basically told him , we need to go to counseling and he would need to be open about his finances and his life In general . I would require meeting his children and family if we are going to make it work . He told me verbatim that he do not trust me and I do not obey him so go on and “do me “ since I don’t want to obey him , and so therefore he will not open up to me or be transparent about his finances nor will he be introducing me to his kids . He also told me he will not take an STD test . So okay I am officially done . Then to add insult to injury , last night he drove lyft from11:00 pm-9:00 am . Around 11:00 am I decided to go run some errands , as I get in the car I see his wallet . I looked inside his wallet and I find three different hotel key cards . I just contacted the hotel to see if I can get the receipt smh . So I’m pretty devastated right now ..can’t stop crying ..

He said he wants to work it out . But he just doesn’t want to get a better job . I asked him again yesterday , if he could help out more financially . His response “im in a lot of debt “ I m trying to dig myself out of a hole “ when k ask him what bills is he behind , he tells me to “don’t worry about it “ when I ask him how much he makes he tells me to “mind my own business “ ..he doesn’t sleep in the same bed he sleeps on the couch ..he doesn’t cuddle with me ..I can’t remember the last time he gave me like a passionate kiss , it’s probable been almost two years ..he tells me loves me but his actions doesn’t really speak it !!

Because he told me to not look at his phone

Typically we do split the costs for vacations

Just a quick update ..tried to talk to him about the issues we are having .the whole secrecy with his family ..the issues with no intimacy and Romance for the past nine months . And he still hasn’t changed .he suggested we go on vacation for Memorial Day .. I start to suggest ideas and he tells me “I am only spending 250.00 and you will have to pay the other half or remaining cost” . This was his idea and now he’s asking me to pay half of the vacation costs “ I just told him I don’t want to go now .then in at the same o arms e I was sitting by him the couch and someone was calling him and he immediately put the phone Down so I couldn’t see who was calling hom I tried to grab the phone and he told me “don’t worry about my phone mind your own business “so today I see him pulling up in driveway as I was peeking through the window I noticed he was not wearing his wedding ring I actually saw him as he put the ring on whole he was sitting on the car then he walked into the house as nothing happenned . Smh

They are recognized by the court in the state of Georgia

Sort of ..I’m kinda in a bind . We talked about a post nuptial agreement . He promised he would sign it , but when I brought the forms for him to sign .He refused . Explained he thinks I am just setting him up to divorce him .. wants us to work it out and go on vacations every month to try to help our relationship ..

We are legally married . Both American citizens . As far as I know he do not send money to his children .. I think one is 19 , and the other two aged are 17 and 15 … the obey thing is according to him … what GOD says k. The Bible .. even though I do not agree … we are renting a long term airbnb …. We got married because we wanted to see if we could come together and work …

Exactly ! I feel like we are just roommates . We sleep on different rooms. Don’t have sex . Have seperate bank accounts . Have never met his children or immediate family member. doesn’t share too many personal details about himself . And when I mention all these issues to him ., his response is always “ learn to obey “ ..

So I go to him yesterday about the car I own ..I have a 2018 Nissan Altima that he uses to drive with Lyft . With the rideshare , he has probably put about 100,000 miles on the car , so now the car is only worth 4,000 dollars . I still ow about 16,000 dollars on the car due to high interest rate . I was able to get it refinanced with a credit Union which will lower the overall amount I owe . I tell him that I want to plan to pay the car off . He respond and tells me you should buy a new car and not pay the car I have off early . I’m not obeying by paying off the car I have now first . I’ve asked him could he help me pay it off . His response was that he can’t make any promises . and goes on to ask if I’m still on track to buying a home for myself . He feels I should buy a new car , pay two car notes and buy a home which when I asked him for help . His response is he can’t make any promises . I even told him I would give him the car once I paid it off , he still refuses to commit to a guaranteed amount he can pay me for the car .

Probably will not be ..I asked him again to go to therapy to work on himself so he can be a better partner . He refuses to go so not sure what else I can do ..

He said it’s to help pay with extra bills ..but as of now he’s been paying me around 30.00 to 40.00 dollars per day to help with the rent and a credit card bill

I understand that . But when I asked him the reason for the change of clothes , it just didn’t make any sense for his response .but maybe I shouldn’t have even asked him about it and just left the topic alone for another time .

Update : so he left to go to work last night Lyft was giving out bonuses for drivers . As he was leaving , he had a change of clothes in his hands I just casually ask him the reason for the change of clothes . He replied “just in case I get pulled over by the cops” and then left for the night . Didn’t come back home until 5:30 am this morning . Sometimes he works nights which I verified but why the change of clothes ??then when I texted him after he leaves I ask him are we still married “ in a romantic way “ he replied “YES , but why are you always hating on me , I can’t do anything or make any money because you are always questioning me about everything. Was I in the wrong ?

I suspect he May be using his money towards other woman . Just based off the text messages I found a few months ago . He sent a woman 100.00 to see her masterbating herself . Then another woman he met with lunch to discuss “business” . Then some other woman he was telling her he wanted to take her on vacations and help fund her business .

We tried counseling with a few therapists , unfortunately he did not like or agree with the therpaist point of view or recommendations . Plus I was paying for it , and he wasn’t really trying so we stopped going

Yes it was from flirting and exchanging personal numbers and then meeting up with some of his riders which is against the company policy . He’s basically created a sham / fake business which he doesn’t have and had business cards made up to look like he has a business

I thought so

And to add insult to injury , I found flirty texts on his Iwatch with other women , sometimes while I was asleep in the other room. Smh . I have caught him sexting other women , he even bought one woman some Victoria secret lingerie , he had sent money to toe he women via cash app to quote on quote “ to do GOD s work “ yet he always have issues when I ask him for help .

No I really don’t to be honest .

He was underemployed when I met him . When I met him , he was staying a office space for 300.00 without a bathroom and kitchen with a part time remote data entry job .