val212

I agree with Scout , if someone, man or woman is seriously unhappy, then by all means get out. However, if the love is still there, counseling should be brought in.

Also, what about the ones who choose not to disclose that they are in fact married? Would that be the "seductresses" fault?. Some men, who I consider animals, do not wear a ring and/or allow for anything else that would indicate they are married, which is shameful. Some people are very determined and good at concealing things from others. They want to have their cake and eat it, too.

I would not date someone married as there is too much at risk and way too much drama. Also, I would never want to be second.

People considering cheating should be left to figure out there lives and reach a decision- we are all entitled to make mistakes and to be happy. Sadly, some people marry the wrong person or marry at the wromng time and as a result, someone will suffer.

Smoking is bad any way you look at it, and Iam myself a smoker. My mother, who had 6 children, smoked through her pregnancies and we all turned out healthy. It should be noted that during my mother;'s pregnancies in the late 60's through 70's there was not much literature on the effects of smoking during pregnancy, so people, including doctors, really were not that educated and did not view it as a serious danger.

THIS IS NOT TO SAY I ADVOCATE SMOKING WHILE PREGNANT, because we know so much more now. However, I know of several people who were somewhat "allowed" by their OB/GYN to have a few (3-5) cigs a day within the first trimester. Of course this is still not recommended nor encouraged, but Doctors feel that the later trimesters are when the fetus is really beginning to form organs and such, and thereforeeee smoking at those stages causes greater risk. IF she hasn;t stopped, she should shortly if not immediately.

Well I said " I should have given you my number" when we missed each other at the bar. He very well may have thought that I was just being polite and diplomatic, in other words, insincere.

I take a bus to work and I noticed this guy for awhile and I admittedly

checked him out, in other words, I gave him the "eye". He hardly looked

and I assumed he wasn't picking up the vibe and wasn't even remotely

interested. Anyhow, one day back in May he sat next to me, which he never

did, and I was very excited , but nothing was said. The very next day

he sat with me again and said, "Can I ask you something"? I was like,

YEAH!!!!!!! He asked if I had gone to this highschool , which I had, and

he introduced himself and asked if I remembered him. Honestly, I did

not remember him and I answered him honestly. ANyway, we continued with

our conversation and I learned that he's my age, single, funny, seems

nice, etc...

I also made it clear that I was single. The problem was and is, I dont

know if he;s just being friendly or he's interested.

I dont see him on a regular basis n the bus but whenever I do, he sits

with me and it's always nice. I noticed he sometimes will say things

jokingly like " I feel im annoying you", or "You're probably like here

comes the annoying guy on the bus" , or "Do you want company" and to all

of these things I always say of course I want company or you're not

bothering me, or I enjoy your company, etc., to reassure him. I feel bad

and I wonder am I doing something that's throwing him off? I've tried to

hinting to him and setting up scenarios so that he can ask me out and

he hasnt.

The most that has happened is back in July, 2 months after our first

conversation, he asked what I was doing over the weekend, so I said Im

supposed to go to this singles event with a friend at a local bar and he

said he'll try to pass by,then he said he would have to run it by his

friends, he;s obviously not going to show up alone. I was like SCOREm

Finally he made a move!!!! I figured he was waiting for an opportunity

like that. Anyhow, it wound up pouring terribly that night and I didnt

wind up going. When I saw him on the bus the following week he asked if I

ever wound up going and I said and he then said he would up going to a

different bar. Then I said, I should have given you my number, which I

think was his cue to say, "Yes, Let me have it for next time".

Unfortunately he didnt say anything. I was like, Ok, that went well- NOT!!!!

I feel like I try to encourage him and stuff, but nothing.... Honestly,

I dont know what I should be doing? Maybe I should throw my bra at him

as a sign of interest, ha ha just kidding. Seriously, I really like him

but I prefer men to do the asking out and I really dont care what year

we're in, somethings should stay old fashioned in my opinion, it's

nature.

Also, he never talks about other girls and no he;s not gay. However,

one day he sat with this girl who he's friends with and I dont believe

there's anything going on there and he told he went out with a girl , and

I wondered was that for me to hear??? Because the last time before

that, I started to tell him that I went out to this place and he was like

there are alot guys in that place and that it's like a meat market. I

said that I wasnt interested in the those types. Then he said he goes

after work on Thursdays, so I said we shoud go out....dead silence and I

know he heard me. The only thing I can think of is that he just thinks

that I am being polite and cordial by saying we should go out/.

WHat is the problem this is all very confusing and I really like him .

I cant believe we;re 27 and it;s still a problem unless he;s just not

interested????