Male

The possibility of her finding out is slim to none. My girlfriend doens't know her, not even any mutual aquaintances. I didn't tell anyone else, and I used protection. Seems to me most of the people who say to tell her give the reason to alleviate my own guilt. In my mind it would be one selfish action to alleviate my guilt from another one. I think I'll deal with the guilt, hopefully one day I'll get over it. I think it'll be better for us that she didn't know.

I'm a guy, have been committed to a girl for 4 months now, and I just cheated on her. First of all, this is the first time I've cheated on ANYONE. I'm 29 years old, and have had a few relationships that lasted many years, and never even cheated when the relationships were getting bad before they ended. Second: I feel like crap. I know this will NEVER happen again. I hate excuses; because I take full responsibility for my actions, but there are a couple extenuating circumstances I feel are at least partly the cause for my indiscretion. 1. After the beginning of our relationship, when sex was nearly every day, our sex life went from that to once a week, to nothing, back to once a week (where it remains). 2. I was drinking. (a horrible excuse I know, but it does have an effect.) 3. The girl, even knowing I had a girlfriend, was all over me, and I, like a spineless wimp, gave in. I'd like to write more excuses, but I just don't have them. I feel like crap for doing it, and know it will never happen again. Feeling remorse immediately after, I told the girl to leave. (She even apologized.) So, am I a dirty pig? Any advice?