Annii

I'm confused now she sent me a text saying "I realise I owe u amongst others a thank you. Ive become the happy confident person I wanted to be and I couldn't have done it with out you.Thank you.". Then we had a chat and she said she is still very hurt and very angry. Annii

My girl dumped me a month ago. I went to see her a week after and we ended up sleeping together she told me that a really big part of her wanted me back but that she was scared. She then said that she wanted me and her other ex but couldn't have either. A week after this she slept with her other ex. We started getting on better but last night I did something really stupid. She was teasing me about a girl I kissed and insisting we went further than we actually did. I kept insisting that we hadn't but she wouldn't have any of it. I saw red and for a split second I wanted her to feel the pain that I felt so I went along with it. She started crying harder and I knew I'd succeeded. I just felt so bad and I was disgusted with myself for lying and for wanting to hurt her. I came clean that it was a lie because I couldn't live myself knowing I'd lied She doesn't want to know me now, shes furious I lied deliberately to hurt her. I tried to fone her today to apolagise but she wouldn't have any of it. Then her best mate sent me a text telling me to get on a rocket and blast into space and stop messing with her mates head. I feel so bad, I feel like doing self harm which I've not done for months and I can't stop crying. I feel I mess everything up and I dont know what to think or do Annii

Hi This might be quite a long message and I am sorry if it is, I'll try to keep it short. Basically my girlfriend dumped me earlier this month and she said it was because she diodn't love me anymore and I was too insecure and she couldn't go on loving me enough for both of us. She also found my depression hard to deal with. I went to see her the week after the split for a few days. It was really weird just being friends and we ended up having sex. After that she kept asking for cuddles and asked me if i could consider an open relationship to which I said "No". She kept saying that a big part of her wanted me back but that she was scared of me leaning on her too much again. We went out bowling with a few mates and I asked her why she looked sad and she said she wanted to hold hands and asked me what I wanted it to mean if we did. I said that I wanted it to mean that we were trying again. About 10 minutes later she grabbed my hand and gave me such a gentle look. You can imagine what I thought. Just before I left she told me there were two people she wanted to be with, me and her other ex but that she couldn't be with either. I found out that a week after all this she spent the night with her other ex. She did not tell me straight, I found out via someone else and when she found out I knew she apolagised and said she didn't want me to find out that way. I feel this is a very shallow thing to do. People are saying she sounds very confused and like she doesn't know what she wants. When she slept with her other ex she was very worried over a letter she had sent to her MUm telling her she was gay and also her gran was in hospital. Other people say that what she did was very shallow and shows she didnt think a lot of me. The thing is although I am angry and hurt and I feel used. I do still love her and it breaks my heart that I can't be there for her when she needs someone (at the moment its too painful) I don't know what to think, or how to act or feel or what to make of her actions. What are your views Thanks for reading AnnMarie