seahorse79
-
Posts
2 -
Joined
Content Type
Profiles
Forums
Articles
Videos
Blogs
Store
Posts posted by seahorse79
-
-
I met my now fiance online 3 years ago, we love each other dearly. i guess you all have experienced the whole parting scene, and well, each time it gets harder. this last visit he was here for 2 weeks, we slept together and were with each other EVERY minute of that 2 weeks, not even exaggerating except for maybe bathroom visits lol.
during the last few days of the visit, i dont know why, but i started getting angry and out of nowhere just getting silent when we were having fun and shutting him out. i wasn't getting tired of him or wanting him to leave or anything, it was bouts of depression or something and i even cried for like an hour (or more) a few times. i used to be more reasonable than this when he left, i understood it had to be done and all that.
this time he applied for a few jobs to move here and i'm happy about that but the whole process will take a while. but anyways, ever since he left i've been sad, depressed and angry and i've never been like this before on the other occasions he left. usually, i could bring him to the airport, cry maybe just a few tears, and head back home to my normal routine and be ready to take on another day.
Now i'm doing that, but i feel like crying 75% of the day. Sometimes i'm frustrated with him because i feel like he doesn't have the same feelings i have about him leaving, i feel like he isn't sad like me (not that i want him to be, but you know, i'm just having crazy, stupid feelings and i can't stop them) When i was crying about him leaving, i kinda expected him to shed a few tears but all he did was flip on the tv.
anyways, i guess i'm just wanting no help in particular,i just want to know if any of you have ever felt similar to how i feel right now, and how i can pick myself up somehow. i think i'm just extremely sick of the distance, and maybe i'm taking it out on him (not my intentions but yeah maybe so)
he does'nt show love
in Relationship Advice
Posted
ok, i feel like my fiance does not feel the same way i do about him. I feel stupid and silly for thinking this, but its the truth. I love him, and i know he loves me because he moved here all the way from california, which i'm very grateful for. The thing is, sometimes i wonder about him. I feel he ignores me a lot. Its not like we see each other all the time, we dont live together, i have school and work and he has work.
A few days ago, we hadn't seen each other all day, so i went to his place and thought we could watch tv for a while and maybe have some alone time. When it came time for that "alone time", he just flipped on his laptop. Needless to say, i left lol. It made me sad how he makes me feel like this a lot. I feel like there could always be something better to do, than be with me. It makes me mad how he's kinda thoughtless too. Please dont think i'm a complainer, i'm far from it, its just that after almost 4 years in a relationship a person can only take so many repetitive things that hurt.
For christmas, i got him many thoughtful gifts. i put a lot of thought, time, and money into these things. I got him things like, his favorite football team things (a book, dvd), a firefighting calendar (he is going to be one someday and likes these kinds of things) and well, you get the idea. I gave him things from my heart and he liked the gifts, but kinda looked like he didn't care again...lol. The gift he gave me, was not so thoughtful. I showed him i appreciate it, and i do, but it looked like a 10 minute gift that he just wrapped up and didn't even know what it was.
Well, basically i wish my fiance cared more, or at least expressed more. I have to initiate everything almost, kissing, hugging, holding, anything. i cant' remember the amount of times he's said "i love you" without me having to say it first. It hurts me a lot and i dont feel like he's falling out of love with me (due to the fact he has moved all the way here just for me) but i just can't feel the love from him anymore. i dont know what to do.