Rob1000

Thanks puppy.

 

I definitely believe that time off would help mend the relationship. I just hope that she comes round to my way of thinking. Even if she were to call me and asked me back I think I'd prefer to us to take things very slowly, (i.e. meet up once every fortnight for a coffee) and see how we get on istead of jumping straight back into things.

Hi SL.

 

I think the only thing you can do is go into NC. I reckon he will come calling. And when that time comes you have to be strong.

 

Read Majord23's 'The Perfect Plan'

 

and 'Keeping Emotions in check' threads

 

 

for advice on what to do when he does. I've found those two threads very helpful as I am in NC for 17 days now and reading them have really helped me to stay strong.

A brief intro to my situation.

 

My ex called it a day on March 16th after 19 months together. We had been going through a patchy month or so, had a one-week-long break up in February but decided to give it another shot until that fateful day just over 2 weeks ago.

 

She made it clear that she still loved me and would love for things to be back they way they used to be, but felt she had lost the passion and didn't believe we were right for eachother anymore. And this was making her unhappy.

 

I thanked her for the memories and have gone into strict NC ever since. I have since heard from a part-mutual friend that she had been crying endlessly following the break up. I have been going out quite a bit, keeping myself busy and generally trying to get on with things. However, I still break down sometimes and I want really want to get her back, even if it's 6 months or a year down the line.

 

I hope to initiate some friendly, totally un-needy (no relationship talk) contact in a month or so (providing I'm emotionally stable by then) just to keep in touch and hopefully get back into her life slowly. And hopefully by having some fun, I can show to her that we can get things back to the way they used to be.

 

I've just read Majord23's 'The Perfect Plan' and I would appreciate any encouragement or advice that can be thrown my way on my situation or how to initiate that no-strings contact when the time comes.

 

Thanks guys.

 

Rob

Good work camguy. I love the "I feel drunk" line. That one definitely would have got caught in her throat!

 

Me and my ex have only one or two mutual friends. It wont be until September when there's a birthday night which could involve us meeting. I know for sure by then that I'll be well over this, which is uplifting in itself.

The simple fact is that our exes were attracted to us - that cannot be disputed...and attraction is not a choice. It is based on something beyond thoughts and all to do with an individuals feelings and preferences.

 

So it stands to reason that if our exes were attracted to us at some stage, then it is a very real possibility that they will be attracted to us again....if we become the person that they originally fell for.

Yet more sound advice and encouragement major. Thanks again. This along with the 'absense and desire' piece at the beginning of the thread gives me more reason to stay strong.

 

I'm so glad I found this forum and some genuinely nice people to share this difficult time with.

I love this thread.

 

I am currently in day 16 of NC with my ex and hopefully in 3/4 weeks I will be (emotionally) able to initiate some contact with her. It's pleasing that I have learnt from passed relationships and cut all ties and started NC the very day she broke up with me.

 

I've also learnt a lot more from scruffed, enotalon and majord's contributions and it definitely helps that there are guys out there putting the same plan into action and getting results. Give's me encouragement. And I will keep reading this thread to keep myself in check.

 

For now I just have to remain strong and find peace in the fact that she doesn't know how I'm feeling and I bet she's wondering about me.

Hi guys

 

Its been 12 days since my g/f of 18 months broke up with me. For those 18 months I was everything to her. She constantly told me how much she loved me and wanted to spend the rest of her life with me. But for the last month she became a little distant, then after a trubulent few weeks she ended it saying she didnt think we were right for each other, that she'd lost the passion and how she wished things were like they were last year. But I want her back!

 

I haven't contacted her since she left, which I am pleased about, but I want her back so badly. What should I do??