Paul78

I agree with you.

I did mention that neither of us has children. It just all feels very stale. I feel like her punching bag. Her communication with me is terrible. She never makes anything clear, she never answers any questions or concerns I have. Its just so frustrating. I think the writing is on the wall.

you are totally correct. Perhaps i do? I am questioning myself i must admit. I guess I always try to see the good in someone, especially when, for a short period of time the relationship was great, so i guess I cling onto the hope that those days will return. I feel like ive been molded by her this way. Some may call me a mug.

I just find her behavior towards me extremely odd. She NEVER asks how my day was, she never asks me anything come to think about it. She never asks how my mother is, or what i do in my time when im not with her. I got a new job in September last year. I purposefully didn't tell her what the job was to see if she would ask me anything - she never asked anything about it. So to this day she still has no idea what I do for a living!!!!!! I get the impression she is not even interested, in anything.

So, i am 44 male, my partner of 16 months is a 41 female. The last 4 months with her have been a living hell. We do not live together. We see each other at weekends only, but not every weekend, but most weekends. She will sometimes come to mine, but more often I get the impression she cant be bothered making the effort to come to mine so I end up mainly at hers. Neither of us have children. When I say things have been a living hell, let me explain. She has been finding any excuse to argue with me, like literally ANYTHING! It can be somthing as silly as me coughing, the way I close a door, even if i decide to do jobs or chores around her house that she needs doing, she will find a way to argue with me over it. I decided to wash her car recently because it was filthy and she started an argument with me over it. When i calmly explained I was just trying to help she replied "well i never asked you to do it DID I?" For a while I have been ignoring the way she talks to me and argues at me, but recently I fought back, and she did not like it one bit. I get the blame for all the wrong decisions she makes even when im not even involved. I called her out about her behaviour towards me recently and it was all turned back onto me by her saying "im the way I am because you make me this way". I have not seen my partner for nearly 5 weeks now as I feel like we have both needed time apart. During this time we have had whatsapp contact only and during this time she has been very hostile towards me. I have explained that I would like to talk calmly and try to resolve this but she either ignores me or just has another go at me. Last weekend she said she had a very important work assingment to complete so she needed some space and time to complete it. This is no problem, I told her that I will not contact her while she completes her assingment and that she should feel free to contact me when shes ready. On the Sunday evening she messaged me a very hostile message asking why I had not been contacting her over the weekend. Then she continued to say that its because I dont care, that I never message her. I was in disbelif and i still am. I referred her back to her message that she needed space and time to complete her work and i showed her my message saying she was welcome to message me when shes ready to. I then got ignored. I have been giving no contact to her for a few days during our space apart and she will have a massive attack on me saying I never message her, but then when I do message her her replies are one or two words, like she doesnt want to talk. Its like I cant satisfy her?! Whenever I do send her a message she often will not reply to it for at least 15 hours or even more, yet if i dont reply to her message within 1-2 hours she goes mad at me. It seems whenever I produce facts to her about her bad behaviour towards me she starts to ghost me or go on the attack at me. She is the master of not accepting responsibility of any wrong doing, but flipping it back onto me. Last year her own sister has told me shes convinced shes a narcissist. I never really knew what one was until researching recently, and I think her sister could be right. For a long time I have ignored her bad behaviour towards me but recently I feel enough is enough. I have tried to talk to her calmly about it but its like adding gasoline to a fire. It feels like she prefers to have the problem than find a solution. She is the master of coming up with excuses or simply down right ignoring any questions I ask. We have not shared a bed nor been sexually active together for over for 8 months. Whenever I stay at hers she wont sleep in the same bed as me and she says its because her mattress is uncomfortable, yet during the week when im not there she sleeps in that bed?! Im sure there its lots more ive missed out but ive tried to keep this post as short as possible. I do feel like im in a prison with her. I know I should walk away but I like to try and work at things before throwing in the towel. I just cant understand her behavior towards me and im here to try and understand it more.