For background - been in a ~1 year relationship with my boyfriend (30M) that I met on Hinge. I'm located in NYC, moving to California next year for a new job and coming at a crossroads whether this relationship is worth continuing to do long-distance / stay for the long run (marriage) once I have relocated or whether to part ways.
I am an Asian woman, grew up in Los Angeles, went to an Ivy League university and worked at an investment bank for ~6 years in a front office role. Parents are immigrants so the frugality / high achieving mentality was instilled in me at a young age and still persists to this day. They are urging me to reconsider my relationship particularly now that I will be relocating for work and want me to start a family sooner than later given my "age" (and have traditional values around the role of a man / woman in a marriage).
However, my boyfriend is White, he works in education and grew up in New York. He is a lovely, handsome man, cares for me deeply and we get along very well. He is not very familiar with Asian culture / values so there is a bit of a cultural divide but he is receptive to learning / experiencing more of it. He wants to stay in New York, at least for the next few years. I've had a few prior boyfriends and there is a chemistry here that I haven't experienced before.
My parents mentality is that the economic reality is very important and that the man should make enough to be able to support a family or me if I decide to stop working / lose a job, not necessarily as much as I do but have at least a good career trajectory. I make 300k+ annually with potential to double my salary over the next ~5 years assuming I continue working in the industry, while he only makes 70k and the ceiling is much lower in the industry he works in. If the gap was less pronounced and wouldn't expand as greatly over time, as well as not living in a HCOL area, the salary would be a less important consideration as I think about the relationship. I understand the practical ramification but my heart is also swayed / I love him a lot - that being said, I also want to prevent future disputes around money down the road and not result in a divorce.
All - seeking your advice and help on how to think through this decision process. Particularly curious for those who have had similar situations and maybe a few years out into the relationship (or split) and how it panned out.
