Evolili

Hello guys, I wanted to do an conclusion to this topic since you helped me with your messages. I left my boyfriend. He is now my ex since almost 1 week. I just couldn’t imagine being with him during an entire week in vacations. I realised that I suffered a lot because of his behaviour during our relationship and especially the day of my birthday. I decided to go alone on this trip and I celebrated the new year’s eve alone in another country : it was amazing. I feel so free now. It’s my first time alone in vacations and it’s very therapeutic. I walked for hours in a city that I didn’t know and it felt so good. I kept repeting myself that it was the best decision ever. I’m now good. I wish you all a happy new year ! Thank you.

Thank you for all your messages and your support. It helps me to see other opinions from other people. I think Batya33 was right by asking me if I knew my worth. I actually struggled (and still) about my self estime. I didn't have any standards when we started our relationship (I was only 18 and didn't know anything about love). Bad things only began to appear clearer to me this last year, because I allowed too much. And it's hard to consider a breakup for me because I idealized a lot the relationship. Thank you for your messages. I will take the right decision.

To Batya33 : I sometimes tell myself that I need someone who corresponds me more. But I don't know if it's possible or am I just picky. Like I see there are evident problems in this relationship. I just can't convince myself that it will ends. It's would be so hard to lost someone that important. Like even if I don't want to be his girlfriend anymore, he's still important for me as a person. To Wiseman2 : I want to see one last time if the love can come back. It would be a trip of one week. I can imagine that it could be cool or horrible. A last occasion.

I don't know. He told me that he loves me and he seems he does, but why he doesn't show his love ? Right now, I would not risk our friendship and I think I have to be sure about my current relationship with my boyfriend. It's so hard to know what decision to choose.

Hello, that’s my first time writing here. I’m sorry if my english is not perfect, that’s not my first language. I’m am in a relationship since 3 years and a half with a man. It’s my first relationship. Everything was good at the beginning, but this last year (even the 2 last years), our couple changed. We see each other maximum 1 time per week (we live litterally at 15 minutes of each other). If for example, we saw each other more than 2 times in one week, I call it a miracle. Why don’t we see more ? I don’t know. I’m a student, I have a social life, but I can have time for him and I always told him when I’m free. But still, he doesn’t find the time to see me. He doesn’t do anything at this moment, so he’s free. At the beginning of the couple, we were seeing each other a lot, because I reserved each friday for us. I always went to his home. Because of that, I didn’t go out with my friends on fridays. One day one friend asked me why did I do that. And I didn’t know what to answer. So I started to not reserve all my fridays to us. I thought he would still ask me every friday to date me. But no. Since that, we rarely go to his house. We have maximum one intime moment per month, because he doesn’t ask me to go to his house. I don’t ask him for dates anymore. Because now I’m not the one planifying the dates, it’s been almost 2 years like date. Sometimes I forgot that I have someone who loves me. At the beginning of the couple, I remember asking him for attention a lot of time and he changed a little, but I don’t think it’s enough for me. I need more love. I have so much talked about my needs. I know that I could love him more and could do more things for him, but because of his attitude in love, I lower my love language. I know that I can give more, but I can’t. Because when I did it in the beginning, I was suffering because he couldn’t give me the same amount of love. Now my problem is that I started catching feelings for a friend. She’s everything I could love by someone. Her personnality, her love attitude, her face, like she’s the person I could fall for. I’m embaressed, because I’m thinking about her since 2 months. We’re very close friends and I know she loves women. I doubt that she loves me. The thing is that I think a lot about her, but not my boyfriend. She gave me a lot of attention and a presence that my boyfriend don’t. The last thing my boyfriend did was to ruin my birthday a few days ago. He didn’t even come to me to say Happy Birthday. I cried all day. I was waiting for him all day and all night. He didn’t come. He said that he will catch up in a few days. My mom is very disappointed of him. I don’t even dare to tell my friends that episode, because I had big expectations from and told everyone that he would prepare me a surprise. I’m feeling very depressed since and don’t felt loved at all. I don’t know what to do. I tried to rebuilt our relationship a lot of times. I’m tired of this. I’m starting liking someone else and I don’t know anymore if I love him. We have a trip planned in two weeks. Should I go with him and see if things could change ? Should I give him chances ? Is my relationship okay? I’m so lost.