Nucca08

Dumped her and put my "friend" in his place 🙂

I bought her a gold bracelet worth $700. I bought her AirPods, a watch, I drive her everywhere. F*** the flowers! I DO give her compliments but sometimes I forget and it pisses her off and then it feels like I have to give her forced compliments. I treat her better than your ex treated you.

You are right. I will never let it happen again.

I'm the opposite from jealous. Never been the jealous type. Jealousy breeds from believing you're not good enough and I don't have that problem. I know my value and I'm confident in who I am. But I'm not perfect. I always tell my GF that she has the freedom to do whatever she wants. I've never tried to control her. I want her to have her own friends, life and hobbies - she has none of this. She has a lot of broken friendships and doesn't have close friends. The issues is that she doesn't like it when I go out with my buddies for drinks. She gets paranoid that I'll cheat on her which I have never even considered doing. I'm always cold to girls outside my GF. She was in a past relationship where the guy cheated on her (this was 10 years ago). But that has nothing to do with me and shouldn't put that baggage on me. She also complains that I'm not good with compliments or buying her flowers and romantic gestures. But that's not me and I've told her that. I prefer doing other things rather than buying her flowers or writing poetry - that's cheesy to me - but I try for her sake. She doesn't flirt with other people in front of me because she knows I won't let that kind of behavior slide. But in this situation she acted differently. He has communicated with her and sent her money in her mailbox as a joke. I don't know if she has his number or texts him because he has a GF. He behaved normal before I met her but as soon as I brought her in the picture he switched up and started with the insults.

It’s issues that we have discussed and solved already. We have talked multiple times about those problems but she brings them up every time I open up about my feelings (which I rarely do). I don’t need an excuse to dump her. I just won’t let her flirting with my friend and having sexual undertoned jokes slide. I’m bad with setting boundaries but this is something I have to stand up for because it’s not acceptable behavior in my book.

Talked to my girl and she's denying that she's flirted with my friend and that "she was just talking about tightning the table". But when you playfully hit each other laugh and giggle then it's flirting at that point. I told her I'll talk to my friend and confront him and she said "don't let your friends action dictate what I'm doing". But I told her that her response is her responsibility. Anyway, I also told her I have to reconsider our relationship and I have to think about where to go from this point on and she said that if I dump her because of this then it's my problem not hers and I will have to live that fact after letting her go. She also started to argue about things I’ve done to her which are irrelevant to this. I’ve tried to be a good partner to her but she keeps bringing up stuff that has nothing to do with this. I don’t know the real definition of gaslighting but this feels like it.

We’ve been together for two and a half years. And she’s 26. When I mention issues to her she keeps deflecting and changing topic on things I have done wrong.

Hi, My girlfriend seems to be reciprocating my best friend's flirtatious comments and actions. Background: I've been close friends with one of my best friends for over 20 years. Two years ago, I introduced my girlfriend to him and his girlfriend. This marked the first time I officially introduced a girl to anyone, as I generally keep my life private. However, I liked her and thought it was time to involve her with my friends. During a dinner at his place, my friend started making disrespectful jokes about me, questioning her choice, and continued throughout the day. “you could chose anyone and you chose HIM?! Are you blind?”, “I’m just curious, wt* did you see in him?” This pattern of disrespectful behavior persisted during subsequent visits, with him bringing me down at every opportunity. After three meetings with her, he told me that if I broke up with her, he and his girlfriend would still maintain contact with her, even though I hadn't mentioned breaking up. This, combined with flirty comments and actions between him and my girlfriend, raised concerns. Comments like “I’m the only one who flirts in this room” while looking at her, and her reaction being getting shy and starting to play with her hair. Fast forward two years, and during a recent visit to his place, he made her cook while they’re laughing and giggling while cooking together. When the food was done my friend asked her to tighten the table leg (you have to rotate the leg), he then asked her in a flirty tone “is it tight?” And she responded “I would say it is tight”, - all this was done with a flirty undertone. When I expressed my feelings to my girlfriend, she denied any issue. She is not innocent, she has subtly reciprocated his advances by flirting back. I feel betrayed by both my friend and my girlfriend. He acts flirtatiously only with her, and she hasn't shut down his advances. I need advice on what to do. Should I cut them both from my life? I should also mention he has a girlfriend.