Hello all,
Recently I had to move in with my mother. I'm an adult woman in my early 30s. My mother has always been a toxic person towards my father, myself and sister since I was a child. Earliest memory was when I was around 5 years old. I mean I didn't call it being "toxic" as a child, but she was definitely, "mean." Just for some insight on how she is toxic.
She's overly critical of me. I seem to not be able to do anything right according to her. I'm not wearing my clothes right or I'm wearing something incorrectly. When I'm in the kitchen cooking an actual meal, she tells me my food is gross looking (just because it's stuff she doesn't eat). Or says, "what nasty stuff are you making today." In her case, she only warms up food in the microwave, or heats up canned food. If she needs my help and I help her, I'm not helping her correctly and she just lashes out at me for nothing. When I was in college, I told her what I wanted to major in and she told me I would never make any money doing that. When I take the time out to do my makeup on special occasions, she will give me a backhanded compliment. "Oh you look nice, on other days you look terrible." This goes on and on.
I'm moving out to my own place in January. The holidays are coming up and for my own mental health, I honestly cannot stand to be with her for the holidays. I know I can easily spend them elsewhere, but if I do that, my mother will never let it go that I didn't want to spend the holidays with her. And if I were to stay with her during the holidays, she would just criticize me over everything.
I want to spend the holidays with just my boyfriend, but like I said, she will talk about me nonstop that I didn't spend them with her. And I will have to hear about this directly to my face until I move out.
This is so crazy. As I type this, I feel like a little girl. I think I just wanted to vent, or "meet" others who have similar problems just to talk.
Thank you.