Unmotivated

Argh! She wasn't there tonight. Either that or I missed her when we were really busy. Whatever the case, I don't work again until Sunday. The worst part about this is the waiting.

I guess I'll go to Wal Mart tonight.

Heh heh... Thanks for the posts.

I'll see what happens tonight. I really don't know if I'm going to have the ambition to talk to her but, we'll see.

You may remember me from the "Approaching a Wal Mart Girl" thread. Well, the funny thing is that know I have pretty much the opposite situation. I work at the campus cafeteria during the "Late Night Snack" (8p.m-11p.m.). It usually draws quite a crowd of students.

Anyway, there is a girl who comes in often. I remember thinking that she was very attractive (to me... probably not to most people) when I first saw her. This was about two months ago, when I started working there. At first I kind of tried to get her attention, but I don't even remember a single occasion in which they was actually any eye contact between her and I. So basically I gave up and assumed she already had something going on with someone else or just wasn't interested.

Along comes last night. I had just clocked out to go on break. I sat down with my food and wasn't really paying attention to much of anything. I see this girl walk by and look her in the eyes subconsciously. This time she looked back at me as she past. I didn't think much of it until I went to get a soda from the fountain drink machines. I happened to look her way and saw her looking right back at me. I got my soda and ventured another look over that way. She was still looking at me, with a little smile. I quickly returned the smile and went back to my seat.

For the next fifteen minutes of my break, while I was chatting with my co-workers, I kept looking over at her table. She was sitting with a (female) friend. Both of them seemed be making occasional glances my way. After I went and clocked back in, I saw them get up to leave. I walked right by her and snuck a quick glance in passing. She wasn't looking at me. I watched her leave while I got some stuff ready to get back to work. As she rounded the corner towards the exit she stole one last look at me.

Officially the most interesting twenty-minute break I've even taken.

I work again tonight and she will probably show up. I'm kind of at a loss as to what to do. I'm not very good at talking to girls that I'm interested in, and I'm definitely not good at talking to them with lots of other people around.

I have no idea why she has suddenly expressed so much interest in me, where as in the past she hasn't even noticed me.

There is also the issue that I'm at work. Being "professional" isn't really a problem. This is about the least professional job I have ever worked. All of my co-workers are tech students, just under the age of twenty. Their night usually consist of standing around and watching the girls go by and then saying something like, "Woah! Look at the *** on that one!" "Aww, yeah!" "Nice." I'm sure all of you know the type. I just hope these guys don't ruin this for me somehow...

Anyways, this ended up being kind of a long post, and I appologise for that. If anybody has a tip or two on how to approach this situation, I'd really appreciate it.

Eh, went last night and kind of messed up. I grabbed a couple of random things just so I could go through her line. Problem is that there were two cashiers last night. At Wal Mart the cashiers are supposed to stand at the entrance to their line if they don't have any customers. The other cashier was closer. I should have walked on by, grabbed something else, and came back the other way, but I didn't think quickly enough. I figured that it would be pretty awkward if I skipped the first cashier and went through her line, so I ended up checking out my stuff with other one. Oh well, I think I'm going to need an instance when none of her co-workers are around to seriously talk to her.

Tried again tonight, but the she wasn't working.

I guess I'll see what happens tomorrow. I bet some of the workers there are wondering why the heck I keep coming in at 1 in the morning alone to buy some random crap. lol

Anyway, I'll keep you guys updated, and any suggestions are certainly welcome. I really just want to get it off my chest, whether or not anything good comes from it. I'm definitely focusing way to much on this situation, if you know what I mean.

Yes, I do understand that these people are being paid to be nice to the customers, but I feel like there is more of a connection once in a while. Four years ago I worked as a cashier in a grocery store in my home town, and I know I would try to do some subtle flirting with customers once in a while. I'm sure the store/business would not approve of it, but I don't really care about what they think. It's between me and someone else. The store is just the place.

However, I do think that it's easy to read to far into a simple smile or laugh, or even a quick conversation, with a worker somewhere. My problem, really is that my "social senses" (if you want to call them that) are not very well refined and I have a hard time telling professionalism from real interest.

Just on a side note: I'm sure movies and TV are to blame for this problem too. Where the protagonist conquers the heart of this really cute girl and they have a wonderful romance. I don't think that happens very often for real. (If ever)..

I agree. Movies teach us that no matter what, if you try hard enough you can get anyone to love you, but this doesn't seem further from the truth. People are interested in different qualities in people... I could be the complete opposite of what someone is looking for and that person could be exactly what I am looking for, and no amount of hollywood charisma is going to convince her that she likes me.

Thanks for the replies.

I'll have to check which finger the ring is on next time. I feel sort of silly going to Wal Mart with the pretense of buying a snack just so I can go through her line at the checkout.

It's good to hear that I'm not the only person in this boat. Frustrating isn't it? I lived in the dorms at my college my first two years here and then my friends and I moved into a house. Since the move I have felt extremely disconnected socially. The only time I really get a chance to meet people is in my classes or at campus events (which I don't really go to that often). Oh well. I guess if I really want a relationship I'm going to have to go out of my way to look for it.

Anyway, I'll keep you guys posted.

I'm hoping for a bit of advice from someone here. I have been very frustrated the last few years because I feel like a never get a chance to meet any females. I find myself reading into each little look or smile a stranger gives me. I wonder if it means anything.

Here's my latest thing:

The Wal Mart in Laramie, Wyoming is open 24 hours a day. My friends and I sometimes drive there sometime past midnight to get some food and sodas. The last few times I noticed a girl who works there. She was the greeter (the Wal Mart employee who stands at the entrance and says hi to people) the first time she caught me eye. She's pretty, nice, and seems quite shy. She looks a few years younger than me (I'm 22).

Every time we've gone there lately, she has been the only cashier on duty. My friends and I like to goof around a lot and she would smile and laugh. Her and I seemed to sort of avoid eye contact every time she scans my food (I'm a bit shy too), but each time she would look at me and give me the usual "Have a good night." and I couldn't help but wonder if the attraction was mutual. How can I tell? should I just ask her?

Pause. The first thing that comes to mind about this is a conversation I overheard in class last semester. A guy was telling someone about how he went to dinner and noticed that the waitress seemed kind of interested in him, and so he asked her out. She basically said no, she'd just got over a relationship and didn't want to start anything. Well, another waitress heard the conversation and told the manager and the guy got banned from the resturant.

I certainly don't want that to happen, mostly because it would be rather embarrasing.

Anyway, this morning I woke up and kind of rolled around in bed thinking about her and told myself that tonight I was going to go and ask her if she wanted to go to lunch tomorrow. Well, by midnight I was more level-headed and decided that was a bad idea, but I went anyway, just to see her again.

She was there, but there was some supervisor-looking guy looking over her shoulder, so I really didn't want to try to chat or anything. Well, I caught a glimpse of her left hand and saw this ring. And not just a regular ring. It looked like a pretty nice one.

Here we see my lack on any real social experience. Do girls where rings for the heck of it or only to symbolize a relationship? Should I muster up the courage to ask her out or am I just setting myself up for a big embarrassment?

I appreciate any advice anyone can give. Thanks for reading this.