sam1256

I met a guy couple months ago, first time I saw him, I really liked him, he was good looking, great hair. I had this good image about him. So the second time I saw him, I was really hyped. But when I saw him (morning time lots of light), I was kinda disappointed, I felt like he was not that good looking, he had bad skin, messy hair (the first time I met him at night I didn't really look at that), he does not have a good style(maybe just the second time didn't dress well). Just overall I was not super into him. He has a great personality and super nice though. Based on how he looked the second time I don't really like him. Is it ok to believe that you can change someone? I was thinking to take him to a hair dresser or introduce him to some skin care products. I do see his potential and I know that he just does not know how to style himself. I am like pretty into appearances, I know it is not good, but I think it is the foundation of liking someone for me. I unconsciously just said you need sunscreen for his wrinkles, it made me feel really bad, it's like saying that he is not good enough, I don't know if he was offended, after talking to him a few times i know that he's an introvert, even he does not like something he just disguise it with a smile. I do not want to hurt him, he has a child's heart.... just a general question like is it bad to want to change someone? Date for someone's potentials?

Yeah, he told me he's gay.

Thank you for writing, I think you are right. I don't want to end up being too pushy. Meet him a few more times and see where it goes.

I started to see a guy, first time we met, I hinted that I was single, he didn't mention what he was looking for. He said that he would like to see me again We planned to meet again for a movie, then lockdown happened, during this time, he kept replying to my Instagram stories, the most active person. Three months later, we met last Saturday. We went for a movie as planned, I was hopping that we would get intimate during the movie, like getting close to me or something, but that did not happen... We hung out the whole day from breakfast from dinner, we did have a great time, and he kept saying that as well, and he said he can't wait to see me the next time. I just didn't feel that very close level of affection, but he seems to really want to hang out with me/ After we met, we text even more, he basically message me everyday now, sharing what he is doing and stuff. But I am just not sure what is his intention. He is a really nice guy and super shy, definitely an introvert, he did not want to make any choices in terms of ordering food when we went out, he always asked me to choose. I kind of want to ask him if he wanted to date, but I am afraid of how is he going to respond. I really want a boyfriend, not just a regular friend. So far, in our messaging, even though he is super active, but he has not shown affection. Should I keep seeing him and hoping that if will turn into something? Also, I am from Australia, and he is from NZ, and he came here for work and want to see if he wants to stay longer after one year. Maybe this is what stopping him to want to date?