jex24

Today should have been our 4 year anniversary. July 24, 2012- the day that changed me for life.

I can't believe how much has happened in the last 4 years and how much you've changed. I don't even recognize the person you are today. I am truly disgusted by you and the things you have done. I hope that one day you look back and realize you made the biggest mistake of your life by letting me go- although I think you already know that deep down.

Anyway, I am moving on with my life. You've already taken away 4 years I can never get back. I don't need you anymore and I certainly do not want you either. I hope that by the time our "5 year anniversary" comes around, I don't even think about you. It's YOUR loss babe

6 months NC. I've been thinking about and missing him a lot lately. But I'm all the wiser now and I know that he is not worth it. He doesn't deserve me and never will. I'm losing hope, but maybe one day I'll find someone who will..

You completely ruined me. I f*cking hate you

I'm a big fat lonely depressed mess, and it's all your fault. I hope you get yours tenfold someday

4 months and a few days NC. I miss him every day.

BUT I'm better off without him

Day 30 something.

Today is his bday so I'm not having an easy day today. I'm super emotional and just missing him lots but I'm SO ANGRY at him for everything he put me through. How do you hate and love someone so much at the same time?

Just want this day to be over

Day ###

 

Broke my own rules and FB stalked yesterday. Didn't hurt. Didn't feel anything. They don't post a lot. Probably too busy planning the wedding, right Not bothered. Honestly!

 

My real issue is I'm still having trouble dating, and trying to figure out how to get myself in the right mindset. I'm not going back in the past anymore, but I don't know how to go forward. I just don't have the effort to put into it to reap any kind of reward. And every time I DO put in the effort, I get bored of the girl really quick and end it. I don't know. I'd really like to be with someone, but it takes a lot of time to get to the "being with someone" phase. And I'm still a bit afraid of being hurt again.

 

 

 

Welcome to the club! Truly, you lost those things 2.5 years ago. It's just they were replaced with a zombie that kind of looked like your friend, and you kept him chained in the attic and feeding him pieces of your brain every so often, thinking, maybe enough of your brain shavings would turn him un-undead? Time to kill that zombie and face life in the post-apocalypse.

 

Wow that turned a bit gruesome lol. Don't really kill him, just walk away for good. I think it's my cue to walk away now

 

Lol truth. And I like it gruesome.. I'm ready to kill that zombie. Also I can relate to your issues with dating. I'm not sure if I haven't found the right guy yet or if I'm just stuck in my own head and am not allowing myself to open myself up to someone else. It's been a really big struggle for me though. It's tough to be in the right frame of mind after a bad breakup.

 

Day 2 for me. Work was a decent distraction today since it was so busy. Tonight is going to be tough because I know he'll be out drinking and there's a very good chance he'll drunk text me. His number is blocked though, so I'll never know. But I'll still wonder....

Day 1 of full NC.

We officially broke up 2.5 years ago but he's been around ever since. After 2.5 years too long, I am cutting the cord. I'm tired of him stringing me along, trying to be my "friend", his constant drunken confessions of feelings that he tries to cover up, all the lies, all the bull. Everything. Yesterday was it. I told him to never contact me again, and then I blocked his number (because I know with absolute 1000% certainty that he WILL contact me). I AM DONE! DONE, DONE, DONE.

I lost my best friend and the love of my life in one fell swoop. The hardest thing I've ever done, but I'll get through this. One day at a time.