A Guide to Succeeding on Tinder

Dating has never been so easy. With apps like Tinder, it's hard not to get swept up in the promise of an exciting new potential relationship with the tap of a finger. However, there are many pitfalls that can be found in the shallow depths of Tinder, and one of the most common is a disconnect between the pickiness of users and the chemicals that make us want to connect. Meeting someone new is rarely as easy as swiping right, and this guide will help you navigate the nuances of finding someone special on Tinder.

The first step is to come to terms with the fact that Tinder can be a great tool for meeting potential partners, but it is not without its flaws. On paper, Tinder seems like a dream come true. You can see photos and brief bios of potential dates within your own area, and with the swipe of a finger you could be about to embark on a whirlwind romance. In practice, however, the experience is often quite different. A person’s photo and profile are only a snapshot, and that might not be reflective of the person on the other side. Schwableartz and Bartlett (2015) caution users against basing judgments solely on looks, age, and sex, as this can lead to disappointment of parties involved.

This is where understanding chemistry needs to come into play. Chemistry is defined as “the strong or sweet emotion of attraction between two people” (The Free Dictionary, 2018). When it comes to physical attraction, Tinder relies heavily on a user’s appearance, but chemistry is what forms the real connection. This kind of connection can only truly be felt through conversation, which could be why Tinder has rolled out its own messaging platform. It’s important to remember that chemistry cannot be determined by anything except spending time together, so don’t get discouraged if you don’t feel an immediate connection with the first few people you meet.

The second key to being successful on Tinder is being aware of your own biases and behaviors. If you are too picky, you are likely to miss out on some great matches. There is no one-size-fits-all type of partner, and being open to getting to know someone may be the key to unlocking connection. Before you even create your Tinder profile, take some time to think about what kind of person you are looking for. Rather than just relying on whether you find them attractive, consider qualities such as values, interests, and personality traits.

It’s important to be honest about your intentions for using Tinder. Too often, people set themselves up for failure by setting unrealistic expectations (e.g., thinking that Tinder will provide them with a match who turns out to be their soul mate.) With any dating app, or even in -person dating, it’s important not to have expectations of an immediate bond. Instead, adopt the mindset that you are meeting someone new and take it from there. Honesty and transparency in your conversations can lay the foundation for a successful relationship before you even meet.

Overall, Tinder has the potential to offer incredible experiences. Harnessing the power of chemistry over pickiness is key to finding success on the app. Taking the time to thoughtfully construct your profile, getting to know someone, and being honest about your intentions can go a long way when it comes to finding a potential match who could become your next special someone.