I am going thorugh asimilar thing..the panic attacks mood swings.. im turning into a monster I dont even like me much at the moment. My partner is about to pack his bags because he lied and betrayed me and I wont settle for less than the whole story.Whereas he thinks one sentence about it is enough....i Dont want further doubts in the future I want to move forward but how can you when he is so arrogant about my emotional needs purely selfish...funny thing is he is so generous in every other way but I so need him to step up this time.. Its so sad hes the love of my life and as I write this my realtionship is all but over.. the pain is so immense..but Im trying to refocus my negative energy into positive. I am not to blame and at least i take comfort in knowing i have no guilt....Im looking in my mirror proudly and know one day after this pain I will be that wonderful loving strong girl again Im 43 and still growing.. Keep your faith