Rally

Day 6

Nothing.

Day 5

Feeling slightly better..

Hmm.. I am curious as to why I don't feel crappy.

I am feeling so broken hearted today, I feel like nothing can hurt me anymore.. nothing can hurt me more than my broken heart..

* * * * en Depressed today. Things feel so bad.. I feel like * * * * en crying. Maybe because I drank a lot. Hmm

Day 4

Day 3

Watched Forgetting Sarah Marshal a thousand times yesterday.

The main character Peter, in the movie, is my role model. I think he is so cool.

Too bad he is only a fictional character.

Day 2

Things feel a lot harder today but thinking about things, I am starting to put the puzzle pieces together.

K, *sigh

Day One

Have to restart this again, oh well I know that after the first week things will be smooth sailin.

At first NC felt like a game.. or a strategy to get my ex back.. and then I realised it was a strategy to heal and forget about my ex..

But now I realised that although NC has the ability to do both the things I mentioned.. It is really a journey or process for one person to gain their self respect back. Once you get that back.. and fully respect yourself..

you will naturally release an aura of confidence and attraction.. haha

It's 2 am, just been thinking and that thought came to my head. Thought I would share it.

Sigh. I emailed him. =(

Almost 4 months NC too, in like 4 days.

. What did you say in your email?

Damnit, I enjoyed reading Kid55's and SA2000 thread.

Well, I broke NC because she sent me and email and kept begging me to message her. I couldn't take it anymore.

I will probably go back to NC soon..

Day 16

 

Holy cow I did so much at work today, physically and mentally. I'm just drained right now and I even went to the gym and did a crazy workout. I'm ready to go to bed.... ZzZz

 

Goodnight fellas

You really do know how to keep busy. I wish I could do the same.

Haha, I thought I was the only one that did that! I'll leave my phone at home all day, or off for the entire weekend so that I don't have to *obsess* over whether he texted me or not, but then I get too scared to turn it on! It literally makes me sick, waiting there watching my phone get a signal as it turns on.... and then my stomach drops when I see I got a text, but from my cell phone company reminding me to pay my bill or something It's almost easier to have the phone all the time and check it every two seconds.

Haha broken hearts think the same

But yea, I know exactly that feeling. It is easier to check it every two seconds, well I just leave it on but I don't bring it out anymore. I rather not have the chance of receiving a random text from my ex and have it completely ruin my already * * * * ty day. But then again... NOT receiving a message ruins my day too. It is too confusing.

You never know.

Don't give him hope.. it just makes things harder.

Yup, theres these things that you do or see during the day thats just going to remind you of her..

and you just freeze.. and thats when the rush of sadness comes. Well for me, thats when I get my daily dosage of depression. hahaha

Yupp..

Its like sometimes you feel happy like you can do this.. sometimes your just straight angry at everything... and sometimes just depressed..

Don't you guys feel so emotionally drained and tired?

I long the day that I can just laugh and be truly happy inside. Anyone feel me on this one?

I feel so sad just reading your journal.

You'll get over this buddy..

Day 5

Bad day, skipped class cause I feel like * * * * .

Have to write a paper.

Lol my phone has been off for 5 days.. I am so afraid to turn it on to see no message from her or worse.. a message from her talking about nothing.

I think you should post this in a new thread!

ok I am going to give this a try. I guess day 1 is tomorrow because I had a break-up/closure meeting and conversation with the ex today. I am going to sign up for yoga. Wish me luck

 

Good luck .

Day 4

Uhm, this is getting easier and easier.

Cept I know I am going to wake up one day feeling like * * * * becuase this NC thing can also be a viscious emotional circle..

Moooovvvinnn On.

I will be starting tomorrow morning. Does this NC mean that I cant even look at his facebook page?

Go for it. Its going to open up wounds you never thought were there.

Day 3

Hmm what can I say..

This is tough, I cant help but feel incredibly lonely today.

Well, NC for good. I am sick of playing games.

C_Unknown2005 and thekid55

I know exactly how you two feel. Just reading both your replies I can feel your pain becuase I am sure it feels similar to mine.

Day 2

This * * * * is tough, but way better than speaking with my ex.

I just want to fast forward 5 months.

Anyway today .. well its just the morning right now. Don't know what im going to do but I just hope the day ends faster.

Kid Cudi - All Along

That song has helped me find peace. At least for now.