majorgeek

You must worry about yourself first and foremost. It is hard. But you must focus on yourself. You can't control him or his actions, but you can control yours.

 

Read books, listen to music, go to the walk or gym.

 

ENA is a great site, but also it can make the healing process hard if you use the information the wrong way.

I agree. He called me about an hour or so and I made sure he knew that I was doing just fine. I didn't tell him I miss him this time and I didn't tell him to call me again tomorrow. I am doing things to make my life worthwhile....I think that is the key.

I got that comment too...and it makes me so mad. It is so dismissive of my feelings. He should be glad that I miss him...not dismissive.

Do you love me or not? Can you love me? Do you miss me at all....do you even think about me? I really hope you miss me soon....I want you to feel what I feel...that horrible longing that happens when we aren't together. I wish I could feel safe and not worry about what I say to you....I wish I didn't have to worry about whether it sounds desperate or needy. I hope you love me, because you made me love you.

No you aren't a loser. Breakups are hard, especially the first few days depending on how it occurred.

 

It gets easier. The missing part just lingers for sometime.

 

I still check out the facebook profile of my ex from 12 years ago (my first love). I just check to see that she is doing alright.

I sometimes wish that movie "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" was based on reality. If I could just forget he exists for a while then I would be okay. I'm giving him some time to think things through. I'm hoping he will miss me, but maybe he will have so much fun he will realize he doesn't want to be with me. That is really worrysome.

Day 13

 

I went on a date last night that went ok. Nothing great, but was nice to know that I can date again and pick up woman. Also I have another date with another woman later this week and Vegas this weekend.

 

Things seem to be going well as far as meeting other woman.

 

Today, on the drive home from work, I just started thinking of ex. and really missed her. I think it was triggered by a car that was the same color as hers.

 

I really just missed holding her. Oh well, I know we aren't meant to be.

I really love my boyfriend and I miss having him hold me too...and it's only been about 15 hours. I feel like a loser.

I truly appreciate the thoughtful reply. We have plans to see one another this week...we have a concert we are seeing together. I don't know how to act when I see him. I don't want total NC, but I just want to give him a chance to miss me....if he calls, I want to talk to him, but I don't want him to take me for granted.

He is extremely bad at talking about his feelings, and if anything, that will be the downfall of our relationship. I'm a big communicator. He HATES it when I try to talk about feelings. It's not always the "I love you" kind of feelings either. He hates it when I get upset with him and try to resolve the issue. He wants to just forget it ever happened and move on. I can't live like that. He says I'm like a dog with a bone....when I'm onto some issue, I can't let go. I say he wants to sweep everything under the rug and that eventually, that will be a very bumpy and uncomfortable rug.

I can't express how much I miss him. He is, in many ways, the sweetest man I ever met. In other ways, he can be one of the coldest people I've ever met. He seems to shut down, emotionally, when something is too heavy for him.

Day 2. I suck at this. I don't initiate the contact but if she calls or texts I answer.

See, I'm a girl in this situation. It seems that most of these posters are guys. Maybe you guys can advise me on this. All guys say they hate girls who play games, but those same guys take me for granted because I don't play hard to get, pretend I don't like them, or answer every fourth text. I don't call them constantly or stalk them or anything, but I find that men feel crowded very, very easily. I have to totally hang back and let the guy make every move, especially in the beginning. Otherwise, they lose interest.

Example: I met this guy who is really kind of a player, and the only girl he ever really wanted was a girl who made him wait 4 months to have sex...and this is a guy with libido to spare. She made him work for it...and that made him think she was some kind of grand prize...and being a girl, hearing the story, it is so obviously a game. She isn't even that good at it...but she can play it for a long time. I'm weak in that way when I really like a guy. I don't want to play games. I just want to love and be loved.

I have been seeing a guy for 6 months. I realized I was falling in love with him and I told him that it was moving very fast for me and I was afraid of getting hurt. He begged me not to change anything...and I did fall in love with him. I told him that I loved him about 6 weeks later..and guess what...I got "I like you a lot" and "I have very deep feelings for you." He says he doesn't know how he feels. I did the only thing I could think to do...I told him that maybe we need time apart so he can appreciate me and figure out how he feels. He didn't want to, but he said okay...and said he absolutely doesn't want to see anyone else.

I really love him and I want to be with him. Guys, did I do the right thing? This all happened last night...and he stayed over, so I saw him this morning...and I already miss him so much. I keep hoping he will call me because I just want to hear his voice.

The worst part is that I just feel so pathetic and needy. It is so hard to do absolutely nothing.