i have been struggeling with work financials and depression for years. But mostly i am fine and i try to be as supportive and present to my wife and only son. In the past couple of months i had a particularly rough time financially and at work. My wife said i over complain and i will always have a problem to complaint about. I didnt get defensive and said she has a point and i will try to be better. But really things were indeed getting worse financially and at work. I just got rejected from a dream job. I was so drained and angry that am alone. So i sent my wife this message on whatsapp:
“ things are getting tougher at work and financially. Every month now my bank account is in negative i try a lot of things online just to make the credit cards dont get declined. And with the new job i was contacted to apply for i was feeling i will finally find the ultimate solution that fits justly what i saw as what i deserve. I felt i worked hard enough to earn such a job and its benefits. And when they attempted to head hunt me i felt i deserved it and i felt relieved.And that am being treated unfairly at my current job. Now i understand very well that this is not your problem and what you told me earlier about that i always have a story to burden you with and that you feel alone and unsupported. I thought i write my thoughts so that neither i say something that upsets you nor you respond with something that upsets me. Am sending you this message to say that i am not trying to burden you more but i am tired and angry and i am unable to do the things that you want or make you happy or feel you deserve. Its nothing against you, you did nothing wrong. But i just want to explain that as clearly and calmly as i possibly can. Its now out of my hands; am just drained and angry. And am trying to cool down basically. So please even if you are not convinced or dont agree; now is not the right time i can handle these opinions.”
my wife responded saying this “thank you for sharing this 🙏” and continued with her daily life. Which was basically napping and watching tv that particular day.
my question is: “right now i feel i dont want to know her anymore. That she is selfish and unreliable and self centric. Am i simply overthinking and over reacting? Is her responses and attitudes normal and its my fault not being strong enough to handle adversity?”
i have been struggeling with work financials and depression for years. But mostly i am fine and i try to be as supportive and present to my wife and only son. In the past couple of months i had a particularly rough time financially and at work. My wife said i over complain and i will always have a problem to complaint about. I didnt get defensive and said she has a point and i will try to be better. But really things were indeed getting worse financially and at work. I just got rejected from a dream job. I was so drained and angry that am alone. So i sent my wife this message on whatsapp: “ things are getting tougher at work and financially. Every month now my bank account is in negative i try a lot of things online just to make the credit cards dont get declined. And with the new job i was contacted to apply for i was feeling i will finally find the ultimate solution that fits justly what i saw as what i deserve. I felt i worked hard enough to earn such a job and its benefits. And when they attempted to head hunt me i felt i deserved it and i felt relieved.And that am being treated unfairly at my current job. Now i understand very well that this is not your problem and what you told me earlier about that i always have a story to burden you with and that you feel alone and unsupported. I thought i write my thoughts so that neither i say something that upsets you nor you respond with something that upsets me. Am sending you this message to say that i am not trying to burden you more but i am tired and angry and i am unable to do the things that you want or make you happy or feel you deserve. Its nothing against you, you did nothing wrong. But i just want to explain that as clearly and calmly as i possibly can. Its now out of my hands; am just drained and angry. And am trying to cool down basically. So please even if you are not convinced or dont agree; now is not the right time i can handle these opinions.” my wife responded saying this “thank you for sharing this 🙏” and continued with her daily life. Which was basically napping and watching tv that particular day. my question is: “right now i feel i dont want to know her anymore. That she is selfish and unreliable and self centric. Am i simply overthinking and over reacting? Is her responses and attitudes normal and its my fault not being strong enough to handle adversity?”