matthew567

I'm not selling it, I didint want this and would of loved for this all to not happen. I was happy and content, she claims she was but I don't believe this was the case.

Yes I agree not everyone wants that, I don't know where I have said that but I don't believe that, I before, this was important to me, exclusivity of being in a monogamous relationship. Yes my partner was thinking about herself but did express she thought this would be something I would want, because its been very busy and we don't get a break from adulting, parenting and having time for eachother, it's not how I would of raised it and the way she did, I've expressed that it was unfair, I believed there was something up for 3 weeks and she withheld this from me, this idea. It's feels it has changed the relationship, I do want to be with her and have the future we had planned before this, but it feels as if she has slept with someone, and I feel this change has made me want to now, but as before and reason why I was upset, is that it takes the time away from partner, family and I made these sacrifices when having children, lots of benefits but sacrifices, knowing that some of my needs and wants would have to be set aside, as I've got to there. She believes in an open marriage and tried basically selling this to me originally, but I thought of the big picture, STDs and other issues that come with it, Jealousy.

I dont believe she has cheated and that she's been open about it, obviously it's something we both enjoy, I enjoy the exclusivity of it, but her bringing it up, has made me question it, and open to it. No not everyone enjoys sex, some enjoy just having intimate or a emotional connection with someone else. I'm not saying there's a right and wrong way. People do what makes them happy, obviously this was nothing on my radar as a busy dad and partner.

It's just made look at the relationship as this was never the option, I would of never asked, but obviously People enjoy sex men and woman, so I would be nieve to think she wouldent enjoy it, I was upset because she brought it up and the concept was she thought it was something I wanted and obviously she did as well, but I was happy before this and I can't take back that it's happened. It feels like this month I've almost delt with the grief process of someone telling me they have gone and slept with someone. Think it worse being in bed not knowing someone true thoughts, so her opening up I guess was a sign of trust and openess to me, but they way she went about it was I felt not the right way.

I feel like the only way to have this relationship work now is to open it, otherwise would I be wrong to walk away and take away from it what I can and move on. Any opinions, I just feel differently about her now.

But she dosent want to anymore now 🤔 And part of her bringing this up was because I was a bit low and was just closing myself off for a bit, I was just surviving as a parent so, in sense was not there for her, but this wasn't communicated and the words she used was that she wanted someone who was interested in spending time with her. We had got use to doing things separately, because of the chuggle, but my head was at home, despite the depression.

I think she got caught up on the podcast, and got a bit excited, yes sometimes I just want to be free for a couple of hours, but not In the way of sleeping with other woman, I like the exclusivity of being in a relationship. It's hard to believe that, that isint what she wants, as that's what she is saying now, but didint think it through, because the thought of me wanting to sleep with people, quote gives her the ick.

I'm as much as a parent as she is, and to be honest she does do amazing, but I think ok this occasion she forgot about her family and was to busy thinking of being free from responsibilities and have new romances.

I believe a 45year old gay man.

So hoop is a type of acrobat, kinda feels I don't reginise the person I fell in love with. She's staying away in April to do a shoot, which is a group thing. When this came up, she explained it as just like having our excercise classes that we do like me going to the gym, it makes us feel good. She said she brought this up as it would be a solution to her issues, but then said we were in a good place, she was lonely on maternity, but I think trying to make friends is great, but I think the idea was make friends but have sex with them as well. Absolutely not where my head was at, I was just riding the bit of a strom I thought it was, but feels like she's added sharks to the storm.

I agree to what your saying. Been out with the kids this morning, and I would usually feel like we were always eachothers support group, and re-grouping once the kids are having a nap, but all I want to do is go out, go for a walk or gym. Can you have a gut feeling about a relationship coming to an end. She says she's chosen life with me and only wants to have these experiences with me, but I know if I would of said yes at the beginning she would probs be talking to other men now. This has to be the most confusing time of my life and I feel I deserve so much better, but feels like throwing my family under the bus.

Hello, so it's been a while since this all happened. I would say things have calmed down, but at times my head goes places and I feel like I have much more questions to ask. I still don't know if this has changed us, it's an absolute battle to try and just forget this and go on as normal, as explained my partner said she was happy and content in our relationship, whilst bringing things up about being able to spend time together which is difficult at the moment with parenting 2 kids and being tired. Yes she would like not to have the responsibility and be free and single again, no responsibilities, I think this includes me, but I'm nobody's responbility. So where do I have mu thoughts now, this is truly something she wants, to see other people, the excitement, and obviously the freedom to go out at evenings times, and i stay at home looking after the kids. It would seem that she brought this up, when clearly she was not happy with the relationship, and instead of communicating to me she went on this journey, after seeing a post about how a open relationshop worked for a couple om hearts and charts. When put to her that she can do it, she came out with thinking of me sleeping with other people gives her the ick, but then she brought this to me, don't understand that bit. I did a counseling session and was one positive outcome of that I identified her going on fetlife was an outcome of listening to the audio book and not a case as she said at first she had en email about someone trying to access her account, so she went on it as a result to the audio book. People say change can only happen if you let it, but feel something as changed as a result of this.

Yes I do certainly look at her different now, the topic and our relationship, I know she would of made A effort for another man, but not me last night. Times a healer and it does feel like my heart is getting stronger. I wont be sad in a relationship just to keep us all as a family, think that isint my responsibility especially after her mentioning this.

Thanks for your response and yes it's not been great. Im so sorry to hear about your farther, that's truly sad to hear and I hope your doing as good as you can be right now. My grandad has the same, and it's very difficult to witness, so my heart goes out to you. A good Smoothie always goes down a treat.

Its funny instead of spending valentines night together, she's decided to spend most of the night showering and straightening her hair, oh and watching traitors. Am I with someone who dosent give a *** anymore, no emotion and has stated about sex being sex when bringing up the open relationship. That's just what anybody wants to hear.