Bruce0070

Understood, thank you very much : )

Yes I understand, but for me clearing my thoughts and closing this "Angel" dossier in my mind is my top priority as I need to have a clear 100% focused mind to face what I'm heading to

Right now it's night and weekend ( I didn't have a weekend for a month and I just finished my first exams session ) so I'm taking a rest and composing some music to release some steam , and I get back to courses tomorrow

Until June, I can't diverge from my list, I really need to score high and enter the top-tier engieering school (Polytechnic school), this means so much as I need to redeem my failure to achieve my goal in high school, as well as the fact that after preparatory school , the engineering school you join will pretty much determine your future ( as well as other factors of course ) Yes I understand that, but I only need to finish this year and then I can provide more time for relationships ( if there will be any xD )

When I joined uni (a year ago ) I thought about turning down and giving up the romantic RS thing as I saw them a complete waste of time ( out of my proper experiences of course ) and I was like "some people are not made to be in RS and only made to work, build, achieve things , and apparently I'm one of them" And so my plans didn't include any RS in the future ( at least until I become stable ( financially and professionally ) ) and I didn't intend to look out for any of them ( until this stockpile of emotions towards Angel was build inside of me )

Yes I go jogging 3 km daily from my home to the gym , which is an opportunity for me to release some stress ( as I love running ) and to warm up xD

Yes, in these 2 years ( 1 is already done , still got 7 months ahead ), I don't have time for anything, my classmates are still surprised that I find time to workout and do my chores ( cooking, cleaning, washing...) as we study from 5 to 7 days a week. So with me doing everything on my list, there's no room for spontaneous actions ( for now at least )

We agreed to take things slowly ( back then ) and , that we would start the RS after I finish my national exam ( June 2024 )

I already did say that, I was planning on taking her out on our first ( supposed to be ) official date in December when I go back home

I'm not disregarding anything, I'm thankful for every word written in this post by every single person. I'm respecting her boundries, her space, her demands, I was just figuring out what should I do next in my life And you already did, by biting my head off couple of replies away, but I was turning a blind eye to it. And I'm keeping a cool head because I was taught to respect everyone and their current state of mind ( to a certain degree of course ) I'm here to seek help and advice, not to start some childish argument, so I suggest you go drink some cold water and take it easy on the pedals and keep in mind that I'm going through a bit of a hard time. And I can already smell that you can't stand me ( I don't know why and I don't care ) which is probably ( as it can't come out of nothing ) based on a prejudice ( I don't know that either ) and wrong assumptions you've been making. Again, I'm not here to argue, I'm here to get some help, I may be intellectually intelligent , but I'm emotionally thick as two short planks, so bear with me.

Sorry, force of habit I guess I wish I can do such a thing ( I don't have time, literally xD)

If she seeks friendship if she's just checking on me if she seeks something more

I understand you all thank you very much in event she contacts me, should I ignore her ?

Understood, just got some questions on my mind When I go back home, should I check on her ? message her or contact her in general ? should I ask her out for a simple casual walk ( as we live in the same neighborhood) ? or should I wait for her to contact me ? Should I even respond to her if she does contact me ? Should I accept if she wants to be in a RS with me in the future ? ( although I don't think that's possible )

It is just hard to grasp that it's not happening , and that special unique thing we had is done ( even if it was short ) but as the others said ( which what I believe in ) gotta get up and carry on grinding