Gb8585

She’s wallowing in nothing. She sees this man once per month and I didn’t make an active choice to introduce her, as I started seeing this man while I was still pregnant.

There is zero reason I can’t do both. She never sees this guy save for a meal once per month. And this guy is never going to love me. He left his wife and son behind voluntarily and proceeded to cheat on his wife. He says he’s a sociopath and doesn’t feel emotion or remorse. But he’s certainly shown emotion w me, especially jealousy when other men interested, so I still do want to try my best to get him to be with me

He is aloof and dismissive and not nice; isn’t it possible he’s telling the truth and hasn’t been intimate with anyone else, including his wife, since before we met?

I feel special, like I’ve cracked the code. Chosen. Because he really isn’t nice. Everyone who knew us at the office where we used to work called him “dismissive”; one said “I forgive you for being involved w that guy because I like you so much!” But he says everyone at his new office just adores him

You’d think I’d run even knowing that he left behind a wife and child in another country, due to his own “selfishness,” and promptly started cheating with me for years. That shows how he treats his own family; why would I ever think I’d be better? He once said that if he could leave his own young son without any remorse, then he certainly could and would do it to anyone. He has never shown me any empathy (simple stuff like holding the door for me at a restaurant instead of letting it slam in my face when I was trying to carry my baby daughter), but actually, he told me he’s a sociopath who lacks empathy and feels nothing except for his child. But when he shows any teeny tiny semblance of caring, I get so excited because it feels like a victory and it gives me more of a rush than some “nice guy” who’s nice to me like he would be to anybody.

Because something MUST be wrong with me if I spent 5 years unable to move on from, or like any man more than, a guy using me for sex while he stays married and lies to his wife. And not only that, but he’s cold (even to my daughter, an innocent kid) at all times, too busy texting on his phone, doesn’t even exhibit the qualities I want in a partner yet I’m so hung up on him

First of all: it’s totally already known in court. Second, why would it be a problem when I’m a single woman and certainty don’t do anything romantic w the man around my daughter (he’s always refused to even kiss me during sex)? revenge from my lover? Fair point. He says now he has “nothing left to lose.” Man he screwed up his life

4!

She’s too young still honestly. But you’re super right about the guy. Which is why I thought it best to create a situation where he can’t be a selfish pig who has it all.

She doesn’t think this guy and I are in a relationship

Correct. He certainly isn’t a committed partner

The proof I gave was unequivocal. So she finally was able to see the truth, not his endless lies- and then choose for herself whether she didn’t care/wanted to stay, or go. seriously my daughter sees this man for one meal a month tops. Do you really think he sounds like he’s invested more than that? If she sees 1 guy w me for 90 min per month who “ignores her” I don’t think I am a “bad mom”!

No need. I’m a wonderful mom, many people who know me IRL say so. Most of the time I’m with this guy is when she’s with her father. What is the problem that we get meals with this guy about once a month? She never acts super upset. She’ll say “he ignores me” but like matter-of-factly

Great question, unfortunately I have never felt anything close to the chemistry & excitement I have with him, with any other man. They all pale in comparison and make me feel bored and dread being trapped ie married again.

I did go through the proper legal channels. Can’t control that he wanted to lie to me to keep me as a side piece while avoiding the financial repercussions and loss of access to his son that come with divorce. occasionally he’d tell me he “still loved her” or “didn’t want to leave her,” to which I’m like, what a joke bc you left her in another country voluntarily and now have cheated on her for 5 years. And genuinely I don’t see why she wouldn’t want to be contacted by me. She is certainly never going to get the truth from her husband, and why waste her life with a dishonest cheater?