H o p e

I lead the project. But I do have a boss. And it was my boss who decided we should contact him. He did cross my mind as business partner but before I even verbalized it, my boss decided. I just proceeded. Everything that happened after meeting him was a suprise. Before, we never had any interaction whatsoever, online or live. I only knew of him because he is in business. He did not know me. I would never organize a business situation to get into personal relationship, I already wrote that when given the idea we should perhaps do another business interaction. That's also what I would advise to colleagues and that's why it was ironic for me.

No, my intuition is usually spot on, it's usually the other way round, people come to me for advice. And I'm just emphasizing the difference between situation such as: And mine, which was full of sparks. If he changed his mind, it was definitely not based on our live interaction. The meeting we had started it all.

He took the time to participate in a project he could decline because he is busy. The sparks were all over the place. We enjoyed talking alone after the meeting, he tried to impress me, when one on one he realised the time is running out and we'll have to leave, he was more relaxed, he was flirting, he touched me. Suggesting we go for a coffee was only natural after the chemistry that was present. It was only a matter of time. I knew he would reach out with a thank you and he did just that. He could have said it in a mail to the whole group. But no, he did not do that. He chose to write me a message on the phone. And after I said yes, I would like to get some coffe, he said Great, let me know when you feel the wish for it. Why we never had that coffee, I don't know, yes, many reasons cross my mind, I've listed many here ... I'm out of ideas.

In my case, ego stroking crossed my mind, too, to be honest. But briefly, I quickly forgot about it - because I wanted to forget about it. Nah, he wouldnpt need that, I said to myself. Well, we never know, do we ...

Thank you!

Yes, as I said, that would mean he was not sincere in the first place. I just believed him. He can't resent that, either. He could have just said what he meant, not what he didn't, so let's not defend him too much, shall we.

They might not be aware of it. But I think this guy knew exactly what he was doing. He was flirting and that's a fact, you can say what you want, but I was actually there. 😉 If I wasn't sure of chemistry, I wouldn't look for any signs at all, especially where there were none.

If I can make another joke, this thread is quite musical. We've travelled all the way from Rammstein to Guns'n'Roses and Metallica. Thank you all for participating. I think I asked all I wanted to ask. I am definitely not as full of hope as I was, but that's life, sometimes people disappoint us/sometimes we have a crush on wrong people.

The mistake message was only few hours after our meeting took place. Next day, I wrote him message I need some additional info about the project. He called me, I missed the call, I called back and we talked. So all these events occured prior to the launch of our project 5-6 days later and prior to him thanking me for the work done and just after thanking me, proposing a coffee. I understand what you're saying. He had my number all the time. But you know what's the strangest thing? That I so much liked the fact that he did not anxiously ask about the coffee all that time when I was busy and overworked. He was not pushy. He was waiting. And I think I wasn't pushy neither, I mean, almost a month of silence was in between, I think I did fine, and I hope he won't resent me trying one more time, I had to do it to move on.

I never thought a short, simple happy birthday wish would scare him off. 🙂 Of course I was aware I was showing interest, I could have forgotten/'forgotten' about it. That, he must have known. But thinking of the meeting, I think he mentioned it on purpose, I mean, it was totally irrelevant to our business, saying a deadline would be on his birthday. It was probably just him being spontaneous. I spontanously decided to wish him a happy one.

My oh my, well yeah, instead of Welcome to the jungle I was looking for some Patience, but I guess I was wrong 🙂

Of course he would rather see me reading between lines, because saying 'no' would just flat out say his intention was not real, it would mean it was merely a phrase, it would say he's not sincere and he can not follow through an idea he set up in the first place. Perhaps it's good to feel so much disappointment as I am right now, that way I will forget about it sooner, I guess.

What I meant is that I use the kissing emoticons only with several people in my life that are pretty close to me, not with strangers, so I would be bothered If he was fasttracking our communication that way. 🙂 I agree with what you're saying, of course it usually is that simple and you just know and don't have to ask yourself about interest. I also planned in advance, just to let him know I do have interest. So yes ... I understand everything. Just hard to accept it was obviously just another phrase. No one wants to hear phrases when hoping for something more ... If this wasn't a business situation at first, I wouldn't be so tip-toey about everything and I wouldn't be afraid to be more direct from the beginning, to just back off when needed, letting no space for any guessing.

No, I am not obsessed but I maybe sound obsessed because I'm trying to find logic in everything. My assumption was: this guy is sincere. He says things and means them. I would never assume he would be using phrases he didn't have to. Maybe he was just just curious, you know, playing a little bit just to test the waters. I don't know. It was totally unnecessary for him to propose a coffee. I would rather see no messages about the coffee from him, you know! Just a 'thank you so much, beautiful, perfectly done' and 'until next time, have a nice time'. I would be much more at peace.

No no no, if he chose 😘, I would find it really cheesy - cheesy on no basis whatsoever. Thank god he didn't use that. 😆