Justin J

lol our marriage is not "doomed" we talk about growing old and travelling together all the time. But its these little instances that trigger me. I am just trying to figure our how to resolve it, or how to react so Im not so paranoid over it

Doesn't that open up opportunities for affairs? Doesn't her reaction show the men and lead them on to believe they have a chance even if she says there isn't. that they would continue to pursue? Shes not one for the flirty type or would even get the hint of being flirted on, but still. Doesn't flirting while in a relationship open up a big can of bad news

Thats what I am afraid of.. Its the being hit on and flirting that could be happening, but I wont know. or will ever know. I Dont think its the fact that I dont trust her, I think its that I dont trust them. but I have to trust her not to engage. which I think is difficult for me. I did talk to her about this and she says that since she is the manager that should would fire them if there was any inappropriate behavior happening. But I dont think she would. She likes attention, she likes to feel that she matters. She wants to feel accepted, and cares what other people think of her. I just dont think she would tell me if any of that were to happen

I understand cheating can happen anywhere. Its just now she spends 50% of her time at work with these men and 50% of her time at home. I absolutely know I have major trust issues because of our past. I am trying to push through it and get past it but its hard and frustrating, and she gets annoyed when I bring up the topic because The last 9 years shes worked with Men, more so now with this new job. I get very jealous, as does she but to my knowledge Women have a much easier time cheating then men. I can't accept the fact that "if she cheats she cheats" I am trying to prevent that from ever happening again. We, like any relationship have our ups and downs. There are times where I believe nothing would happen, and one day Im just like ... But what if there is...

Thank you for that. I am self employeed, so I don't work for or with anyone. The only time shes really around men is at work, besides that we are together a majority of the time. She does not have the need to question me and I am not physically around other women as she is with men at work

A bit about us We have been together for 15 Years and have two kids started off real good for a year, she got pregnant then a couple years our first son was born it turn into a toxic controlling relationship for a few years after, (we both were unfaithful once) then after what I hope to be good the last 10 years She recently acquired a manager position at an oil change place and has 4 other staff ( all guys) and I am having a hard time handling this, Ive tried talking to her about it and she says nothing is going on and that I am the only one for her Should I be paranoid, I dont want to get hurt again. What are some things I can do to take my mind off what "could" be happening