meechu

Its really painful, feels like I got slapped multiple times. And i feel humiliated. Like i worked so hard to love myself and these past 6 months i feel like i went back 20 steps.

I feel the same. In the end i was the second women, and i tried to reject that thought and was in pain thinking about it. I was in that situation before and its painful. I didnt want to believe it, but in the back of my mind i knew i was. I was finding myself frustrated and felt like i was going crazy. Thats when i knew, i had to listen to my gut and let him go.

I felt that. And i confronted him many times about it but he denied and assured that wasnt the case. But i realize i felt like he stopped telling me because he didnt want me to leave. I saw that he wasnt the same. He hasnt deleted her off of social media either even after a really brutal breakup. In that story he was the second guy and rebound. He kept telling me i was 1000x better than her. Recently, his ex reappeared and was looking at his facebook stories. I kept asking if she kept looking and he said no she completely stopped but now i feel again that was a lie so that i wouldnt react and tell him to delete her. I wouldnt have made him anyway, i dont think anyone can heal like that. The thing is i was also going through a rough breakup, we bonded at the fact that we were going through this together. But later i felt i was on a new book, new chapter, he was still on his last book. Its like he didnt want to move.

I blocked him from everywhere. Hard block. It was the most painful thing to do. Because i was tired of him convincing me he was over her and and that i wasnt the second when his actions were showing otherwise.

I was also getting over a break up, and initially thats how we bonded but I was able to let go and he wasnt.

I understand. Thank you for your advice. It felt to me he was internally struggling, having gone through a break up myself when we met. It felt like we both were trying to move on, and it just became about him. I have to admit I was super anxious i was losing him, so i tried to do more by being there for him. Now thinking back, he didnt deserve this treatment at all. Wished id love myself more the those times.

I have been dating someone for about 6 months now. Initially he seemed like a really cool person, I felt that we clicked. We spoke on the phone a lot the first couple of months. He would call me often sometime we would fall asleep with the phone on. Basically, everything seemed perfect. Around the end of the second month he was starting to withdraw. He would call me like usual but not speak and be quiet. I would ask him what was wrong but he would have a hard time opening up. One time we got into a heated argument and he ended up telling me he felt it wasnt going to work. I didnt argue with it because it was new and if he was saying it wasnt going to work i didnt want to fight it. Three days later I get a phone call of him apologizing and him wanting another chance. He also started to tell me about an ex of his that he was clearly still not over by the way he was talking about her. I tried my best to console him and felt "okay this is good" we were getting better at communicating feelings. Things were getting back to normal for about a month and again i felt him withdrawing. He would call me less. One day my sister told me he was on a dating app and i was so shocked, i confronted him, he denied it saying it was old, i believed him. He showed up again a few days later on the app with new pictures. I texted him i didnt want to deal with his BS anymore and blocked him. Three days later i unblocked him thinking maybe i need to hear what he has to say for closure, i told him to call me. He didnt say anything until a month later, wished me happy birthday apologized. By that point i blew up on him and demanded an explanation, he said he was ashamed and that he didnt want to tell me but he finally admitted that his ex was on the app again and wanted to just spy on her. I was so angry but he convinced me that it was stupid of him that i was his first choice (my dumb ass believed him). Since then, he has changed, he calls me less, he doesnt plan dates, I went to to his place twice thinking we would drive somehwhere together but no, he would rather watch TV. He would do this thing where he would be silent the whole day and i knew mentally he didnt feel okay. I tried my best to encourage him and motivate him, putting aside my own issues and demons. He told me he is having terrible depression and feels mentally ill and doesnt feel like doing anything and going anywhere so i understood, as frustrated as i felt. Couple of days ago i was having a breakdown and I felt i needed him and he wasnt there for me. I confronted him the next day and he told me within 15 min that it wasnt going to work out. I asked him if this is what he truly wanted, and he gave me no response. I told him i needed a response for sure if this is truly what he wanted, and called him. No response. But he texted after that he was with friends and that he couldnt talk. Then i made the choice to block him everywhere possible. Maybe i need reassurance, but did i make the right choice? Its super painful and at the same time i feel like a bad person for blocking someone sad and depressed. Was blocking the right decision?