Frankie123456

Thanks for advice oh god no the coworker is well gone, that was embarrassing now that seemed like a just total temporary madness, I never acted on that thank god I was just going a bit insane, probably pandemic life and wondering if my relationship was going to work...

No there is no one else. i am just plagued by the thought no relationship is perfect and I need to compromise or adjust and maybe I’m not doing so enough. thank you for your thoughts 🙂

Hi there, I was with my boyfriend 3 years and we have broken up on Thursday although we have planned to review things in a month. We lived together 2 years of this time and he is currently staying with his mam while I am looking to move out which is going incredibly difficult to find somewhere I can afford. Right now I am crying a lot and everything reminds me of him and I’m wondering if I made the right decision. I basically broke up with him for not initiating dates (I think he’s done this 2-3 times in 3 years) and how I have to organize and convince him sometimes to go out. He spends morning to bedtime on the computer working and playing video games whereas I like to do a big variety of things, sports and spending time with friends etc when we moved in together I was initially very concerned about his sleeping because he would stay up all night and sleep in the day but our sleeping habits quickly and completely aligned. Over time he’s done a lot more activities with me even if he didn’t initiate them and I wonder If I gave up too soon and like the sleep this too would just change? The other problem was our sex life as since the beginning he’s always had a lot less interest in sex than me, I think we managed this ok for a while but when it got to the point when we were having sex less than monthly it was then me that had no interest and I didn’t want to or required more effort to be in the mood. We tried scheduling sex which worked sometimes but other times we’d just ignore the schedule due to my lack of motivation. I’m wondering if this is also something we didn’t work hard enough on? But this one is harder to consider as my desire and motivation were literally zero and it wasn’t a case of tired/busy etc. he’s an amazing guy, always makes me laugh, looks after me all the time, is always affectionate, we’ve always been very affectionate together, he’s incredibly easy to live with it, he’s creative makes me gifts etc I’m wondering if my standards are just way too unreasonable, I know he doesn’t want to go out on dates not because he doesn’t care but because he never goes out himself or with others regularly anyway and it’s not really a reflection of us but more of himself. I’m feeling particularly regretful of this aspect as he will go out more now but I was continuing to feel resentment at being the one planning and making the time. I feel like I’ve given up a lot of good things that I haven’t had in other relationships and I’m wondering if i should just adjust more. I do have one more fear in that we broke up incredibly briefly before (for about half an hour..) for the same reasons and decided to try again but things only changed temporarily before going back to the current situation leading to this breakup and honestly the process is so painful I don’t think i can handle a repeat. Please let me know you’re thoughts and thanks in advance.