misses

4 hours ago, reinventmyself said:

I think what you are feeling is normal.  Running into this friend no doubt stirs up some past hurts.

But what can you do about all of this?   Nothing.  You take a deep breath, let it play out and have some confidence in yourself that you are a good person, and your character will speak for itself.   If he shy's away for whatever reason, then he's just not the guy for you.  It will say a lot about him.

Head high.   Believe in yourself and believe you deserve the best.  The rest can step aside.

To me it feels like I lack confidence in dating at the moment. When I met my ex I was enjoying dating and flirting. 😕

This is a good example for not sharing too much sensitive information about your past love life, especially in the beginning. You never know how people are connected to each other.

10 hours ago, Cherylyn said:

I'll go against the grain here,  I actually feel for you because I too would feel anxious as well.  Whenever there's co-mingling involved with mutual people in our midst,  I don't like it and it makes me uncomfortable.  However, you and I don't have control over what other people do.  You can't tell other people what to do nor force them to disassociate with each other. 

The problem I would fear is what could be said behind your back when two people whom you know could very well blurt out or share information you don't wish to reveal.  It's an invasion of your privacy.  Your life with your ex is now an open book between your ex's best friend and your date.  In your case, since this friend is your ex's best friend,  he could very well mention private / personal information to the guy whom you're dating.  This in turn,  could have the possibility of your date judging you unfavorably which is a dicey situation for you.  Have a wait and see attitude.  Like you,  I'm uncomfortable with the "friendlies" between mutual people in our lives ~ especially after breaking up and / or estrangement. 

 

 

Thank you so much! That’s what I am concerned of! Especially because this group of friends decided to stay friends with my ex and his new girl. I can understand it’s more fun to spend time with a happy couple than with the other woman who was left behind. 
 

I was wondering why he is so up to spend time with this guy. Doesn’t he has other friends? I know he does. Maybe he is not thinking much about it or maybe he wants to gain some information.

but you are right I can’t do anything about it. It may be good to be a bit more cautious sharing private information then. If he is up to spend time with this guy and we don’t end up as a couple I don’t want my ex or my former friends to have too much information about my life.

I feel very insecure at the moment. I guess I need some practice in dating.

He was dating a former friend but this wasn’t going anywhere (as he says) and wants to remain friends with her. 
I pictured both of them hanging out together with my ex and my old friends. 

It was good so far. However, I felt like he tried to push me to come to his place after the last date. I am interested but after meeting the old friend I didn’t feel like this. 

I haven’t unfollowed my ex so far but I am also not active on the account. I think I never blocked my exes only hide my stories when I was still active. 😕

The new guy exchanged numbers with his best friend. We were only talking together for 30 minutes, I was a bit surprised but I don’t think this should be my business.

It triggered me to meet this old friend and I am trying my best not to feel too anxious. 

 Hello! 

I am not sure if I am being too sensitive or too worried.

I am dating a guy and we went on 5 dates so far. On the last I met the best friend of my ex by accident I would say. My date went a long with him really well and they exchanged numbers and so on.

My date and I want to hang out this weekend and he asked me what this friend is up to and he would like to meet him again, “such a good vibe”. I only said I don’t what he is up too.

I always got along with the best friend of my ex and it was fun to see him again. My ex and I broke up not on good terms because of another girl. Most of our friends then choose his side. 

My current date is the first one I am seeing after the break up 9 months ago. I told him the story briefly but not about me loosing most of my friends.

I am now anxious and I don’t know exactly why. I feel helpless about it although it is stupid. I am still looking forward to see this guy but now also wondering if he will start hanging out with my former friends and maybe also choose their side and I end up alone again.