matt9

Well, nearly ten years later and I'm still alive somehow. If someone told me that a decade ago I'd have laughed in their face. I would've thought it was a miracle to make it to high school graduation, let alone to age 26. A few updates: 1) My family is still horrific and distant, but I'm 26 (I was 16 when I wrote this) so it's somewhat easier to deal with. My brother who molested me has gotten a life sentence in prison for attempted murder of his ex-wife, among other charges. 2) I have a few friends now at least. 3) I'm still extremely poor and destitute which sucks even worse as an

So it would be better to continue living a horrible life until a disease or old age takes me out instead of dying on my own accord and sparing myself additional decades of misery?

Can you give one reason why I should continue living? I can't think of one.

It's 2 AM and I have school tomorrow but can't sleep. I just got up from laying on the couch staring into space for an hour feeling like complete crap. I can't keep living this life anymore. Everything that can go wrong in my life does. My dad abandoned me when I was a baby and doesn't pay child support so I'm poor. My mom treats me like dirt, and only wants to move on with her new husband and son. That's fine, I don't need her. I've never had any friends, partly because I'm poor and can't afford nice clothes to look good and partly because I have a shy personality. Nobody made an effort