NoContactItIs

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Very much committed to NC. In fact I don't ever want to have anything to do with her anymore. I guess this is anger showing up. No one is worth the pain. I will break my commitment to post up to 30 days. This is me signing off and wishing everyone here closure and comfort. Stay strong.

Day 3 - Maybe too early in the day to post, but so far it's been a cocktail of emotions... off to a rough start. Hoping to turn it around by the day's end. Keep your head up everybody.

Nocontactitis-it is going to take a while - There are stages of Grief you have to walk thru. They are

Denial, Bargining, Anger, Depression and Acceptance. I have been separated since May 8, 2008 I can tell you I have been in all 5 stages and some at the same time. I am done with Denial and Bargaining. Anger, Depression and Acceptance I feel like a pin ball in a game all three or any combination there off. My relationship was married for 19 1/2 and another 2 of dating. You need to accept this thing, fix yourself (with help) and move on. I find posting here is theraputic. It seems a little morbid, but I feel a little better when I can bleed with a group instead of bleeding by myself. (Not literally . . . nobody call 911)

 

Focus on what you know is good, connect with the world. Your not by yourself.

 

Dave

Thanks Dave, I think I have felt most emotions except anger. Did the bargaining bit, went though the depression (which I'm glad to almost be done with), for the most part have accepted the situation. Might still go through denial here and there and I'm sure I'm capable of getting angry. I don't think I'm avoiding it because I'm romanticizing the past. I just don't generally like to carry negative emotions. I've done quite a bit of soul searching and know exactly where I went wrong which I'm sure will help me in the future. Can't fault someone for wanting to be with someone else. I guess it's more disappointment and I'm sure that will heal in time as well.

Thank again,

Still feeling rather strong. Doing this because I know it's best for me. Not even sure what phase I'm in. Haven't been able to feel anger. Not sure I will or not. It's a mix between thinking it'll hit her at some point and maybe she's too oblivious to even be giving it any thought. Who knows anymore. I'm committed to NC. What concerns me a bit is the day count. I thought the point was to not think about it anymore and move on. I understand the therapeutic effect of this, but not sure which outweighs the other. Constant daily reminder or typing it out. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.

Spent the weekend with my best friend which helped quite a bit. Feeling pretty strong. Had a mildly rocky weekend when talking/thinking about it. I think this will help a lot. I'm determined to shake this feeling. Should be interesting. Good luck to all