reisforpeace

This is a sonnet that I wrote, please give me some constructive criticism...

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Just Out of My Reach

Love is just out of my reach

I lift my hand and it flutters away

Why won’t love land and stay?

I need it to heal my chest’s only breach

To learn from love so then I can teach

New love will replace the old they always say

Well what if it doesn’t work that way?

Love is hardly as sweet as a peach.

Perhaps you are right before me

So close that I can’t even see.

To nervous to come when I call.

But be brave my love, stand up tall.

Bring faith to those who have lost hope

There still is time to help them cope.

this was a poem but i guess it kinda turned into a song.

(btw im a girl also)

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She drives me crazy

She makes me insane

But with out her

Life would be quite plain

It boggles my mind

And makes me want to cry

I just figured out that

With out her I would die

One problem with this love,

It’s a one-way street.

I want to move on

But I can't lift my feet.

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

I call her a lot,

If she only knew why

I need to talk

But she’s checking out some guy

When she’s depressed

I feel like I’m on fire

Let me ease the pain

It’s her that I admire

One problem with this love

It’s a one-way street

I want to move on

But I can't lift my feet

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

Put a fork in my heart

cause I think I’m done

I don’t know what to do

The pain has just begun

I don’t want to seem needy,

Or too concerned

But she wont let me in

That’s something I have learned.

One problem with this love,

It’s a one-way street.

I want to move on

But I can't lift my feet.

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

I probably bore her

She doesn’t understand

She only sees my surface

where my emotions are canned

I want to hug her tight

And never let her go

I’d do anything for her

Doesn’t she know?

One problem with this love,

It’s a one-way street.

I want to move on

But I can't lift my feet.

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

So I’m stuck...

Stuck this way

One problem with this love,

It’s a one-way street.

I want to move on

But I can't lift my feet.

So I’m stuck.

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i just wrote it today so im up for critisism...but mostly i just felt like it was something i had to share.