CHAOSpsycho

I know, and she realizes she has hurt me, and has apologized.

I told her if another situation like this were to happen again, it would not work out anymore.

Hey thanks guys, the advice really helped me ALOT.

My girlfriend is one of those people that believe, if "Someone treats you bad, treat em bad, if someone treats you good, treat em good." The guy apparently treats her "good," which is why she treats him good back. She has told me that it's just not in her heart to treat someone bad, if they don't treat her bad back. Sometimes she just doesn't get reality though. Obviously, the guy is treating her "good" because he knows she will treat him good back. Knowing this, he uses her nice personality to persuade her to do different things, like work on a set with him, go to hookah bars, and all that crap. She doesn't want to hurt him because she said she "can't find it in her heart to hurt good people." Until she realizes she's "too nice," people are going to take advantage of her and use her own feelings against her.

There are a few good things that made me think twice about her though.

-She told me that this guy has "nothing on me, and she will never turn her back against me for him." He's just a friend, and she only thinks of him as nothing but a friend.

-When she was at the gym with him, she and I got in a big argument about her friendliness towards her "friend." She told me that she wanted to cry so much, but she held it in, so her "friend" would not see her vulnerable, giving him the ability to talk trash on me or give her a hug to make her feel better. Driving back from the gym she said she didn't say anything about the current situation about our relationship. She told me that when she is with this douche, they don't talk about how it's going between me and her.

-The next day after the argument, she had a film rehearsal. The same day, I had a family reunion at a beach. I told her how much it would mean to me if she came. She said she wanted to come so bad, but her rehearsal was in the way. I felt sad, and thought it was about time to break up with her. Then at the beach, she called me up and asked "If there was one thing you could wish for right now, what would it be?" I replied "You being right next to me right now." She hung up the phone, and I was like... * * *? Then moments later, she jumped behind me and surprised me. I had no idea she was gonna be at my reunion. She told me she "wanted to throw me off, and surprise me." It made me happy because after her rehearsal, she drove two hours out of her way to see me. It regained my faith in her.

What the future holds: She has proved to me that she wants me, and only me. She said she pictures herself only kissing me, hugging me, and having sex with me. She has said I am her "only one." SHe has told me that she cannot "leave me," because I've proven so much to her. I understand that she acts and goes to auditions because she loves it, and because she dreamt of becoming an actress when growing up. She understands that people in the industry are going to take advantage of her and "hit on her" because she is a very attractive girl. She said it's not going to affect our relationship because they can't have her, because she is mine.

I've responded to her saying that she's "going to have to give me patience and time, to understand why she does the things she does." I trust her that she will not cheat on me or do anything behind my back. Her personality is something I've just never seen in any other girl. I don't exxagerate(sp?) when I say this girl is DIFFERENT. Yes, she is a bit too friendly, but at least she knows it. And yes. she knows her guy "friend" likes her more than a friend, but she says she's never going to turn to him for anything but rides to a gym. Love is understanding and patience, and maybe I'm being too niave, but I'm gonna give her time and patience as well just because... I do love this girl. Time will only tell... Time will only tell..... And if she ever did do anything that does hurt me in the future, it will just prove to me that everything she has been saying all this time was nothing but lies, making it easier for me to let go and move on to a better relationship.

Aight, there's alot going on in my mind right now, which is why I am going to just get down to the basis of my girlfriend and I's situation as of right now.

My girlfriend and I have been going out for three months. I am 19 and she is 18. She is my first love, first kiss, first everything but sex, because she is religious and believes in sex after marriage.

She is an aspiring actor and goes to auditions and rehearsals and whatnot. She has been on the MTV show "Next" before we started going out. She met a guy in one of her auditions and has been friends with him ever since. She met him before we started going out.

This guy friend would drive to her house, pick her up and go to the gym, and they would workout together, well not necesarily "together" but apart if you know what I mean.

When I tell my girlfriend that I get uncomfortable when she does such things, she says that I am insecure, and she says I don't trust her. I tell her it's wrong to do such things because what if one of my friends saw her with him one day at the gym, and I wasn't there, what will they think? They will probably think I allow her to see other guys. Well, today we got into an argument and we just kept going around in circles. Tomorrow, she will be doing a rehearsal in a feature film with the same guy. So is one at fault here? Or am I just being irrational. I'm not trying to point fingers and whatnot. I just would like to know what to say to her next time i talk to her. Someimes I feel she admires her friendship with her guy "friend" than our relationship.

Other past situations: The same guy that goes to the gym with her confessed his "love" to her right in front of my face two weeks into my girlfriend and I's relationship. He "threatened to kill himself" telling my girlfriend she was "the only thing he had." She wanted to jump in the car with him and drive off somewhere to make sure he didn't kill himself, because she "felt sorry for him." If she did jump in the car, she would of left me hanging, but it was a good thing she did not. She stayed with me.

Her mom: She does everything with her mom. Her mom drives her everywhere, talks to her about everything, and almost decides everything for her. When my girlfriend and I got in an argument on the phone, her mom snatched the phone from her and told her my girlfriend had to go to sleep, and that I was causing her too much stress. They are both feminists. They believe men are the downfall of society, I'm never right in any situation. They both agree it's fine that she is going to the gym with her guy friend because they are just friends. I told them how I feel, but they said I need to change... So am I being the insecure bad guy here? Or are they being irrational? I just don't know anymore...