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  1. TLDR at the end. Part 1: Context So to put some background into it, she was my first girlfriend (let's call her Oak) and I was her first boyfriend too (started dating when we were 17 years old). We dated for some time and we got along great. Sometime after joining college (in the second semester) our relationship started to crumble, because I had this theory which I dubbed the Light-food theory. This theory went as follows I know what Regular Mayonnaise tastes like, sure, and I also know what Light Mayonnaise tastes like, it's very good also and I enjoy very much eating it, however,
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