BlueWave

Yeah there is a whole story behind this. A few weeks ago the same guy said to me that he wished I was available. Then, there was some odd tension between us after he said it. More recently, he's been his old self again and we're talking and laughing. I was just trying to get an idea if he's starting to flirt again.

I was telling him when I worked in the medical field, I would get too emotionally attached to patients and sometimes they would not recover. He smiled and jumped in and said "I love you". I laughed and said "well not THAT attached". The conversation was a bit of a downer from there.

Hey guys, I've posted almost a month ago about a male friend of mine. He's a really cool guy and we get along great. Well, today he jokingly said "I love you". I know it was a joke, but can't help but wonder if the flirting he was doing with me before is back again. Would a guy tell a girl "I love you" in a joke if he didn't have feelings for her? I'm not sure how to approach.

Hi everyone.

First I want to that everyone that responded to my original post. The update is that I've decided to act as if nothing was ever said. Only problem is that my male friend seems to have nervous tension around me now. I'm sure that will fade with time. I was very upset when I originally posted because of his "lying". My rational side now tells me that he was just doing what he needed to protect himself. I have to allow people to be who they are- not to react as I think they should (lesson to be learned there). My BF knows what happened and he's not pleased with it. My male friend avoids my BF every opportunity he gets. Again, that's to be expected I suppose. I hope over time, everything will return to normal and we can forget or get past all this uneasiness. I will know better than to over-react and will do a better job than to go on the attack so quickly.

You guys are right. I guess I am overreacting. I took being lied to very personally. I didn't quite examine the reasons through. It has nothing to do with jealousy. I wish him nothing but the best. I just wish he went about it differently.

Blue... count yourself lucky that it ended before it began. How bad would you have felt had he led you down further down the garden path and "forgotten" many more things he had said.

 

I was married to such a person.... who'd say things or do things and forget. Its called "crazy making"....

 

Pick yourself up... dust yourself off and walk with your head held high. In the words of scarlet o'hara..."tomorrow is another day".

Shadows: I can't imagine life with someone like that. Yes it is "crazy making" and it makes me question my own perceptions and sanity.

Tomorrow is another day and it will be a better one.

It's so weird. I didn't have any romantic feelings for him, but he was someone I trusted. I must correct myelf, he said he was "seeing someone" (not a GF-yet), but he was unsure of where the relationship was going. Again, we've been close for about nine months and he NEVER mentioned a girl to me. At the same time, he never wanted to hear about my BF and never asked or wanted to be around him. He would hint about me going out to a club or bar (by myself), but never asked me out. Then out of nowhere he tells me this and then claims he doesn't remember. I don't know if I can forgive him, but my trust is certainly shattered. I feel as if he took me for a fool. All I wanted to tell him was that I was flattered and if I wasn't attached, I would go out with him. His "amnesia" never gave me that opportunity. I flirted with the idea of emailing him, but that might look as if I'm persuing him (which I am not). I think the hardest thing right now is coming to terms with being lied to from someone you trust.

Also, when he made his comment, he also added that "maybe one day you'll be unattached. I hope you'll be patient with me" or something to that effect. How anyone can claim to forget that in two days is just a plain liar and that's what hurts the most.

Hi everyone:

Step right up and meet the newest fool---got myself taken in by someone I THOUGHT was a friend. I was so worried about not hurting his feelings that I made myself the biggest horse's behind in the world.

I posted on another thread a few days ago (The Cat's Out of the Bag). Oh yeah, the cat is out of the bag and laughing at me too !!!!

My friend out of the blue tells me that "If I didn't have a BF- he'd be very very very happy" a few days ago. So today I go to confront him on it. I ask if I can speak with him privately about what he said and he politely refuses to go. I ask if I can email him about it, and he shruggs his shoulders. He then tells me (are you ready for this) that HE DOESN'T REMEMBER WHAT HE SAID ?!?!?! That's right, in less than 48 hours he forgot what he said. I tried to reassure him that I wasn't mad and no one was going to get hurt or anything like that and he tells me he doesn't remember. I only want to tell him that I was flattered. So the bottom line is that I told him that I was flattered over something he claims he doesn't remember !!! Then he tells me he has a GF. I told him I was happy for him and I genuinely am. All these months he had a GF and he never told me, but then says he wishes I didn't have a BF. I am so mad at him now, I can barely see straight while typing this.

I am a fool, I'm a horse's behind and I will learn NEVER to trust even my friend(s) ever again !!!

All I wanted to do was have things go smoothly and I look like the jerk.

I saw my friend for lunch today. To say things were awkward is an understatement. He was kinda distant, a little uncomfortable of sorts. I really like and treasure his friendship. I wonder if he had second thoughts about what he said.

Xixi: I'm sorry I did not respond earlier. I did go offline for the night.

I think I'm just gonna chill for a bit as I know how he feels now. He knew I had a BF. I think playing it cool and letting it settle is ok. I just don't want anyone to get hurt emotionally. I'm not sure if that can happen.

I just smiled and said "I don't know what to say" I've known him about nine months now

I am flattered. I'm just a bit shocked as I didn't know how to respond.

Oh, it wasn't out of the blue..we've had conversations about a lot of different things over the past few months. It took me off guard because I didn't expect it. We talk about a lot of things and I think we're kinda close in some ways. I just didn't know how to repsond to him. I guess I should be flattered.

I was talking to a male friend of mine during lunch. He caught me today completely off guard and I was at a loss for words. He said "If you didn't have a BF, I'd be very very very happy". I kinda thought he had a crush on me, but I suppose this confirms it. I was so shocked, I didn't know what to say. How would you interpret this and what would you say?