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About raquellexxx

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  1. Hello. I am a 26-year-old girl who feels completely alone, devastated, exhausted, and unwilling to fight anymore. Please, don't judge or insult me as this is the last thing I need since I try my best fight and heal my invisible wounds. I am a believer who lives neither in America, nor in England, nor in a country where there are Protestant churches. It's no secret where I live, but I just prefer not to go into such details. However, thanks to the Internet, I started following profiles of Christians in social media - people who inspire me with wisdom and their life. Unfortunately, due to many r
  2. I don't know why I feel so sad, lonely and awful after this.. missing him like crazy...even though I know his words were more than his actions, that he put me after games and stuff, didn't respect me, and just wasn't for me, something in me still says "Did I make a mistake? Should I text him to ask him if he still wants me, if he still wants to continue being together with me?" And I know he didn't play with me on 100% and part of the powerful words he was telling me were honest. People and relationship gurus always say that men always come back and even try to FIGHT for you even though th
  3. Unfortunately, I finally broke up with him and he didn't even try to understand and realize what I told him, not to mention that he didn't even say sorry. He was acting as if in my eyes "he did nothing for me" and that's it.. my last requests for an advice for you are: 1) I know he didn't play with me on 100% and part of the powerful words he was telling me were honest. But most of his actions were showing the opposite. What do you thing was it from his side? Emotional inmature, lack of feeling to put his priorities, 50/50 behaviour, not that into me although all the words, or gaming addic
  4. No and no again. I said in my last message - this country doesn't even need a visa or someone to help you. Even if it did, I would never use someone. The thing was that I was imagining living there with him finally finding the right guy and together, we will live peaceful, calm life full of love...
  5. You guys, I can't describe how thankful I am for your answers and pieces of advice on this hard time for me. I have been reading all of them carefully absorbing them. Lastly, I wanna share with you that since that happened, I have been torturing myself why is it SO EXTREMELY difficult for me to leave him even after all these clear red flags and signs... You know what I discovered? 1) Mainly because I have issues in my family, I was craving for love, calmness, peace, and care. And I somehow i thought I found the resquing in him assuming that he was my SHELTER and safe place and therefore,
  6. I never said I wanted ''gifts'' and ''grand gestures''?! But only just a care, attention, and love. Not just a simple verbal ''Happy birthday'' as if we are strangers. I definitely don't think those are unrealistic expectations.
  7. You know how a significant part of birthday joy is your close people cherishing and making you happy, by showing you how important you are to them? My boyfriend has always claimed how much he loves me and how he wanna spend his lifetime with me. We are in a long distance relationship and I have made lots of sacrifices neglecting my pride so far and he still does things even though I have asked him not to. But on my birthday, everything escalated. When my special day came, I didn't expect gifts or material stuff from him (although I have sent him present just without a special event) but at le
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