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MissH

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About MissH

  • Birthday 01/09/1994

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  1. I was just being me and I didn’t think it over on the spot :’( I know I need to work on this, but I would’ve 100% gave answers if it was him who was “on the attack”.. That’s how I realized, my spontaneity isn’t seen as what it really is by him..
  2. I think you’re the best advice giver here! Reading your replies just gives me good vibes even if I’m struggling.. I know I didn’t react well to the situation, I could’ve handled it better and I’m sure if we were face to face, we wouldn’t be here now.. that’s the thing about this distance, you feel like you’re drowning but can’t do anything about it.. I acted spontaneously, I regretted it but I was also speaking my mind cause I was very upset.. it was extra pressure on him cause at that time he was handling business on his own with no help, and I attacked him, but as you said, we should be able to speak our minds in a relationship.. I was sick and felt neglected a bit so I let it out.. Him ignoring me wasn’t nice at all even if he had the right to feel uncomfortable.. I’m trying to push through everything and move on, I’m sure there’ll be others to date but I’m uncomfortable with what happened..
  3. He was the one who started it after a few dates, he asked how my family would feel about me dating a Christian, and I said they won’t be very happy but if I’m happy in the relationship, I won’t care what anyone thinks and I’ll do whatever makes me happy.. He then asked me to bring up the subject with my family cause he said he doesn’t want me to be in conflict with them because of him and that if I start telling them about him and maybe meet him one day, it would make the situation better.. On the other hand, I insisted that I won’t talk to them about him unless it gets more serious than just dating, but I told my mom I was dating him.. So mariage wasn’t « my goal no matter what” but rather “an expectation if we get along and make each other happy” 🤷🏻♀️ Step by step is what I wanted, but he wanted to tell me about his plans especially that he was at the age of a serious relationship. He “was done playing around” according to him. I don’t see him as a playboy at all anyway! 🤷🏻♀️
  4. I didn’t tell him off, I was just upset that I hadn’t been feeling like a priority anymore! Cause unfortunately, most guys now, when they feel like they secured the girl down, they stop making efforts, and that’s what I felt, like: »Oh let me just take care of this and this and this, and I’ll talk to her later, no need to check up on her now, she’ll be there when I have time! » !!! That wasn’t the case when we first met and when he was still trying to show me he was serious. I had every right to feel frustrated and let it out. It wasn’t me me pushing him away but rather me telling him I felt like I’d been taken for granted. And you do get upset when you talked about it with your partner before and it’s happening again. I respect that he’s hardworking and has lots of things to do during his day but that’s not an excuse to make me feel like I don’t matter anymore. If anything, I’m very supportive and he knows it!
  5. Well, it was very obvious we both jumped in the relationship together and with the same intensity.. I’m sure I was using my brain also at the beginning looking for red flags.. the relationship was 1000% genuine and real..and I’m also sure that if we weren’t separated by geography, we would be doing great cause both of us hate/don’t do well with long distance relationships..(We juste both decided we’d go through it because we wanted to stick together, I gave him the freedom to quit if he thought he can’t or don’t wanna do it and he said “no way”) and that’s what I wanted to him, I’m not going to keep going in and out of relationships just when it’s 100% convenient. All relationships demand sacrifices. I didn’t dump him at all, that was me being angry over a text and I had the right to it even if I overreacted a little.. we’ve been dating for 6 months and a half (4 months of those were Long distance, not 8 weeks)
  6. Thank you very much for the support and kind words Rose! I will keep strong! ❤️
  7. It’s called «knowing your worth » and I learnt it pretty well after my 1st breakup with my ex, the game player.. His loss, not mine, which is why he keeps chasing after me for months after he saw me moving on. Knowing your worth also doesn’t mean rubbing it in your boyfriend's face, but it’s rather a tool « hoping » it would help me a little during this (because everyone will get affected with breakups) I said clear it’s not me being a b**ch about it hahaha Distance though..I’m sure lots of people can deal with it BETTER than me..
  8. I don’t think we’re a couple anymore, I just refer to the relationship between me and him by « us ».. We had dated for 6 months and a half before this happened (2months and a half in the same country meeting everyday/every other day, and the rest were long distance..)
  9. Yes, we definitely have rules. And we argued before about a couple of them but we communicated immediately and made it right cause we had the possibility to do so face to face. I remember wanting to talk about it via text but he said « let’s talk about it tomorrow when I come see you » and we did, it was emotional but great.. I’m with you, 100%, months ago, we were talking about me going to his place to see how life is there with him and in his entourage, but I couldn’t go, the unstable political situation in his country along with the COVID restrictions made it impossible for me to travel even though he tried so hard to make it happen.. he got frustrated and so did I.. Lately, I’ve been even more frustrated cause I couldn’t see us meeting for months and I felt awful and angry, and I’m sure he is the same.. but what can I do about it???
  10. This is more of a better explanation from you rather than talking about time.. it’s more about experiences and what you go through together. Yes, such experiences happen over time, and some people have all this happen in a very short period and make it through..but I can’t expect all this to happen if I can’t move in with him or be in the same country as him.. distance is killing me and our relationship, it’s not easy, it’s frustrating and I may understand that his way of dealing with this frustration could be shutting down like this because at some point, I had some thoughts of « what if we don’t meet in a long time because of the restrictions ? » but I pushed through it.. Everyone has different ways of dealing with frustration and I’m not looking to give him excuses, but I know I don’t do great with distance also, I hate every bit of it, and I know for sure that if it wasn’t for this, we would definitely go through such experiences.. Not to sound arrogant at all, I know that I’m a great woman and anyone would be lucky to have me cause I’m honest and sincere and caring and alll those good things, I do have bad sides of me, no one’s perfect, but I am a dream girl. The way guys choose to treat me does in no way define how good or bad I am. I just think circumstances have been pretty unfair to us.. Talking about watching your relationship end before it starts.. By the way, we’ve been together since April, the « fallout » happened 2 weeks ago..
  11. Yes there are religious differences but it’s not that complicated for us.. he’s Christian and I’m Muslim but we don’t practice that much.. However, we both don’t drink, don’t smoke, don’t eat pork and we don’t have sex (because I don’t, and I know this means a lot to him but I can’t do it before mariage, He definitely understands it, respects it and said he doesn’t care because he wants me and he can wait) He even suggested converting if it will make it easier for us to get married.. As for culture, I really don’t know much, we’ve been acting independently from all cultural and religious expectations mostly, which means we treat each other the way we feel we should, and there isn’t that much rules about it.. Acting the way he did was what upset me more than the act of not asking how I was..even if he was upset..I also reacted dumb and I admit.. this distance and lockdown are definitely doing the opposite of help...
  12. Then how are you supposed to behave in a relationship? Keep your guards up and expect from everything even if it’s an innocent act? that’s how fights happen.. I’m sorry, I’d rather be single than become such a person because of all these new bad standards everyone keeps setting instead of blaming the « bad guy »
  13. Honestly, I do know what love-bombing is, and we never chased each other, but even if he didn’t do all those things to me (i.e roses..cause we still don’t talk in gift language) , spending time together, respecting our differences especially the religious part, cooking for each other, telling each other everything without judging, helping each other get through the hard times (and there were many especially after we lost our jobs) These things make you fall for the other person because you see how beautiful their soul is and how peaceful you are when you’re around them no matter what.. I’m truly asking for a thoughtful advice, but I’m sorry to tell you that you’re delusional if you think you can’t really talk about a serious thing or get to know someone before 2 solid years..It’s called setting expectations for the relationship instead of wasting each other’s time.. I know couples who met and got married in a matter of 3 months and are still very happily married.. TIME MEANS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING, which is why I’m posting here. I may have not dated that much in the past, but this guy is different, and I’m mature enough to know that love is about 2 people making each other happy and sticking together through the ups and downs.. No games, no manipulation, you can’t be having a healthy relationship if you keep expecting this from every possible partner you have.. that’s how you become very defensive and evil.. I don’t wanna be like that..
  14. And that’s what I did, I haven’t texted him since the 22nd of October.. Thankfully, I still remember how strong I became at holding back and knowing my damn worth, so I’m trying to let it rest..and I reaaally tried to move on (avoiding thinking and talking about him, convincing myself I didn’t need him, and I don’t, I just want him and I prefer that he makes it right, but no way in hell I’m going to chase after him, even if he doesn’t reach out at all..)
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