Clayton

I think it depends largely on why the original breakup occurred. If it was infidelity, even if you can find it in yourself to forgive (truly forgive), then damaged trust has to be rebuilt over time, and the perpetrator has to take the lead role. If that doesn't happen or starts and the wavers, BAIL. That person hasn't accepted full responsibility and will do it again.

 

Likewise if the breakup happened because of too many arguments, and the *root* causes aren't addressed, then it's just a "comfort" reconciliation and won't last.

 

Sorry to dampen the mood, but notwithstanding my handle, in my experience they don't work.

Thanks for the reply. No cheating on anyone's part. Still lots of trust there...and no arguing. I just couldn't handle the stress of everything coming at once...my children transitioning, divorcee guilt over sharing time with my children and my new bigger family....but I have learned a lot about myself and won't make the same mistakes twice ( new ones maybe...but not the same mistakes) .

If I could have some advice that would be great...I was with my gf for 1.5 years before we moved in together..but before this we were work friends for 5 years prior. Wanted ( and still do..a life with her) and we moved in together last July. I have two children who came out as transgendered in july& august, the father of her child also came back into the picture and she was supervising visits as he had some mental health/substance abuse issues and was getting his life back together..and my youngest ( 10) had a hard time with the blending as my gf and her son were the first people we had ever moved in ( I had dated long term but I loved this woman and wanted a life with her). Long story short I couldnt deal with the stress and asked her to move out end of December... she was heartbroken and started seeing someone shortly after. We still talk sometimes ( we work in the same building and told me she doesnt have the same spark with her new guy as she does with me) My question is...how do people deal with it all...and since it was circumstance and me not sharing my feelings and ending it..does this increase the chance of a reconciliation one day? Its all very difficult..