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sweetdesire

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About sweetdesire

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  1. This is exactly what I've dealt with my whole life :( Only girl of 3 boy siblings of a traditional 1st generation family. It's ironic because I'm the one who graduated first from college, didn't have kids, never got married tried to do everything right and I'm still seen in the light that I am, it is heart breaking. I continue to work on a relationship with my Mother however at times I feel like giving up since it's hard for me to have hope after all these years. That's great of you to have that mindset and believe in yourself the way you do. It's trauma like this that tend to break pe
  2. Dear Cher, Thank you so much for taking the time to share your amazing story, you truly are an inspiration. From the bottom of my heart, I am so happy for you & your family and everything you were able to triumph in life and I took so much from your statements. You're definitely spot on about a lot of observations and I took more by the last statement about not giving it much thought and just moving on. It can be mentally draining especially if there's no solution to the problem. It's like beating a dead horse with a stick & sometimes we just have to move on and continue focusin
  3. Hi Everyone, I am a 29 y/o F and lately i've been doing alot of self reflection. I've always maintained a busy schedule and always had alot of things going for myself that kept me busy so i feel I've never had a chance to really reflect off the person i am, my upbringing, what makes me happy etc. I'm curious to know what things did you overcome or feel you had to come to terms with in order to live a fuller happier life? Or experiences you feel REALLY changed your life. It can be personal or family, relationships or just your own personal observations from other people. Usually it's expe
  4. Hello, I have dated M. for the past 2.5 years and it has been one hell of a roller coaster ride. The main issue has always been him mentally not being ready for a relationship due to just having ended a relationship of 6 years which he also shares a 4 year old with. He was also convicted of a DUI and was going through custody issues, single father issues as well a career loss due to his DUI. He recently shared with me he was battling depression the first 2 years of our relationship. I tried my best to be understanding but of course someone can only take so much. More and more time passe
  5. Thank you everyone for the responses. I guess I wasn't expecting much reaching out to him just companionship being that we've never been serious. I feel i'm pretty realistic when it comes to my expectations. I reached out because i felt we really did have chemistry and are compatible it just wasn't our time. But yes I believe we should have a talk about this other girl and just clarify where we stand because I'm not trying to be played either. & if we can't see eye to eye then yes it might be best to leave things as they're before one of us gets hurt.
  6. I was involved with a guy about 2.5 years ago, it was strictly FWB, late nights, only called him when I went out etc. for about a year I ended things you can say because I felt he didn't want anything serious. I was young he was young whatever. Fast forward to now I recently reached out to him again just to see how he was doing and we totally hit it off. I mean we would talk on the phone for hours catching up on life and what we've been up this whole time. You can say we both made some major accomplishments, I graduated state, he got a job as an entry level probation officer, we both did
  7. Thank you everyone for the responses. Thank God for Iphones! Since the picture comes with a date stamp and can prove the picture is old. I actually ended up calling him blocked last night and he answered. I guess you can say we both received the closure we needed. He didn't seem upset with me. He seemed to understand why I did what i did and he apologized for everything he put me through..he apologized for leading me on which I don't know what that meant or if it was good or bad but it felt good him acknowledging any wrong doing. He stated as long as we're both in a better place and sho
  8. Hello, I was involved in an almost 2 year relationship with someone who had just ended a 5 year relationship and who he has a now 3 year old son with. It was a very, very difficult time for him. I always told him to do the right thing and since it was so hard for him, to be with his "family" especially since I come from a similar background where you sacrifice everything for your family. He insisted he wasn't happy and couldn't forgive his ex because she cheated and he wanted to be with me. I never ever begged him or manipulated him to stay with me at any given point in time. Throughout
  9. Good Day, I had posted on here previously and received some great insight so here I am, continuing to be involved in same relationship and now in a different predicament. Here is a quick recap: For the past year and a half I have been involved with someone who had just recently ended their long term relationship (5-6 years). They were living together and also share a 2 year old son. She had moved out before he met me and after first 3 months of dating him she found out about me and attempted to win him back. Her and I have had various sit ins and clarified situations however she's a bit
  10. & this is where "friends w/ benefits" becomes tricky..I honestly don't believe you can be involved for someone that long and not get emotionally attached.. Why, Because as you're continuing to hook up, you're learning more and more about each other and sooner than later finding you have more and more things in common. Let's be frank, you're not gonna hook up with someone you're not physically attracted to. Sooner than later, you start to "fall" for one another. Crave each others time more, spend more time together, hook up more thus leading to attachment. I also believe it's important to
  11. That is a very fair outlook.. thank you for sharing. I was actually looking for an appropriate time frame of giving someone who was in a LTR and a year is fair enough. At least 6 months and of course no form of communication unless unfortunately there is a child involved..
  12. Oh yes, I am definitely not okay with ex's being friends..What is LTR sorry I'm sorta new to this forum. I did learn that with my past relationship thank you. We dated for a year and he had a 2 year old son and I realized I was ready to commit to a relationship but wasn't exactly ready to commit to a relationship with him and his son and play step-Mom.
  13. So, I have been noticing a trend lately not just for myself but for my girlfriends as well. I am 26 years old, single, don't have any kids, never been married etc. and I've been realizing a lot of men more or less closer to 30 come with quite some baggage. They either have small children (sometimes newborn's) or recently dated someone long-term. Is this normal? I mean they'll claim they're "single" and ready to date however how ready are they really? Is it true people tend to "separate" themselves while in a relationship therefore they are semi-over the relationship before it officially ends.
  14. Have you considered him to be emotionally unavailable? It seems now may not be a good timing for a relationship either way since even you bring up the ex-wife and their issues. Marriage is a big commitment and it seems he's dealing with his divorce and all those lingering emotions. Is the divorce even finalized? Just continue to be strong w/ NC. Know it was his issues and had nothing to do with you as a person. Time heals all woulds.
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