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About ironi

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  1. Sometimes people constantly tell others 'I'm a honest person, I always tell the truth, I'm drama free' that the other person starts believing it. His actions are not honest or decent. When he said he would choose another girl over you that should be enough for you to close the door on him.
  2. Was just recommending this. You need to be very strong and follow this through. Be smart and stick to your guns. This is not right and you and your children do not deserve this. He will try to emotionally blackmail and brain wash you. But this is not healthy and safe. Be strong and seek help.
  3. Lines have been crossed which shouldn't have been. It's hard to gain back trust when it's been disrespected.
  4. 'She never told me that she enjoyed having sex and dating around from the get go. She hinted that she did not want an open relationship with me. This was the most she could communicate her needs in terms of labelling the relationship.' I'm sorry but this sounds like 'I don't want you to sleep with anyone else incase I catch something' nothing more or nothing less. I really hope you find the girl worth your time.
  5. Literally had to delete my response as its the exact same thing as batya. 'when you tell someone you want to be exclusive that is not just a label -that is a substantive commitment. ' this is so strong with your situation. People can love you and show love and affection but still not be committed to you. 'She wasn't ready to have a serious talk because she wasn't interested in committing to you. People who are interested in committing to you will want you to know ASAP' this is facts - most people have so much baggage and past traumas but that will never get in the way of something
  6. I would sit down and get a pen and paper and go through everything. In a very casual way. It is common to sit down every now and then and go through your bills and see if you can go with a cheaper company etc. It shouldn't spark any argument as its common if you are living in the same house. You should also mention you want to save money for a 'holiday, home, etc whatever it is' So how much should you guys put aside each month? What alternatives could you switch up? This will allow you to dig a little deeper and have more open conversations on where the money is going.
  7. Depending on what country you are from there are lots of helplines and organizations that help women leave abusive relationships and help with temporary accommodation. If its really bad you will need to get the police involved at some stage. I think your safety comes first all medical issues, internet, new friendships or relationships are secondary right now.
  8. When you have to constantly prove your self in a relationship it will become very toxic and tiring for you. Sad thing is when I was younger I was in the exact same situation and he ended up cheating on me 'because he thought I was cheating on him and would leave him' I was so silly I thought that all made perfect sense. Wasted 2 years of my life and honestly I don't even miss or think or care about him now. Only think about him to tell this story. Dont waste anymore time. Be with someone that wants to nuture you and trusts you. Thats a very powerful feeling.
  9. Is she single? I know my married friends feel like some of their single friends have distanced themselves just because they feel they have less in common now. 'she'll be busy with her husband now' 'I don't want to visit or hangout as her husband will be there' I'm a little guilty of it with one friend where I am not fond of her husband, nothing wrong with him he's a nice guy but he irritates me when I visit her and I feel awkward. She has complained she hardly sees me and I've said I'm more than happy to have just girl on girl time. But it doesn't really happen. When I started my bus
  10. It's a bit of an odd one really. How much more money would you give him for example if the pizza cost $10? Just curious. Like would you round up $18 to $20? or $18 to $50? I would take this experience as a learning curve. I know you were originally trying to be nice and considerate but he took advantage. This just shows his character. In future, pay the exact amount and also remember un employed or not they can still afford food and girlfriends. Do not feel bad for sending that gold digger comment his 'reduced my allowance' comment was cheap. Block and delete
  11. Her being on her phone, messaging people doing all sorts is nothing to do with you - its her. If you honestly feel you have done everything plus counselling then I agree with Rose Mosse you need a good lawyer. If you stay in this relationship the continuous disrespect and fight will consume you. Enough is enough. You have a child to think about and need to go through this the cleanest way possible. Your wife is begging you because it worked before - you separated, things were fine but now its started again. Even if you forgave her you'd still have resentment for her every time you fi
  12. I know you mean well. But focus on making yourself feel better and healing. Put yourself first rather than trying to figure out his personality and mindset. You come first, you had a relationship that hurt and upset you now - you need to look after yourself. Then you won't have this I need to be prepared or be ready mindset when he comes back. Sometimes we deflect our thoughts and emotions on 'why didn't it work? I feel sorry for them. What were they thinking? Why are they the way they are?' rather then 'I'm not going to let this happen again to me, I deserve more, Gosh I feel so rel
  13. Please don't compare your future to your past. Your past does not define you. Remember that! just because you had a bad past relationship isn't an excuse for unhappiness now. Once you believe that you'll feel a lot stronger. The reason why this relationship doesn't feel right is because it isn't. Not because of your past. The reason why there isn't a connection isn't because of your past. There just isn't a connection. If you go to counselling go for yourself. To work on being your most authentic self. Dont go to counselling to save a dead end relationship Truly wish you all the best
  14. Sometimes people don't give the best advice such such his grandma and your family. I was in a abusive relationship at 19 and I would tell myself you need to know your worth. You need to take care of yourself otherwise when you get older it will effect you when you want stable relationships. No one I mean no one should push, shout, shove, hit you and vice versa. This shows a line has been crossed and the line will never reappear. Breakups and being alone is very scary but its possible and doable. You need to be with someone that makes an effort in keeping you and continuously working on y
  15. If she doesn't want to be with you then that should be enough validation for you. The reason why she calls you her best friend could be for many reasons. She is friend zoning you. She is trying to downplay her closeness to you as you said she has low self-worth so she is keeping you around to make herself feel better. best friends sounds better than friends with benefits. It sounds like she's using you, maybe not in such an extreme way it sounds. But you give her attention. She knows you want her. I would just be polite but move on and not pay her too much attention when you bump int
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