sunshine12345

Honestly I’ve tried… I’ve been on dates and they never seem to progress any further. I feel I’ve lost my social skills and not able to connect with people confidently anymore. My confidence has lacked and I have suffered from MH a lot on and off my life! I feel people reject me and this is where I’m trapped in this continuous circle ⭕️ of me not able to process! Perhaps this is my life which I’m going to have to except

I’ve been single 12yrs.. she was the only person who I have ever had that magical feeling before. I have truly given up on finding anyone. I’m 43 never married or had kids and times running out. I feel like my time has been and gone and I will never find that magical feeling again with somebody. I hate this generation of online dating.. it’s either a swipe left or right these days.

Yes I know it’s wrong! And I guess I was caught in the moment of reminiscing the old times we had together! All the things she was saying to me felt like she still cared loved me etc etc! Or were they just lies?

Not sure if anyone is still here anymore. But a week ago. We met again in person. Again we chatted and held hands / hugged. Last I heard from her was on Monday telling me she has struggling with her MH and needed to find out what triggered it and needed to spend time with her family. I’ve not heard from her since then! I really feel like crap to be honest! I feel I’ve been led down this rabbit hole and been abandoned!

Nah I doubt it. She wouldn’t be messing me!

So I went on a date the other night from a dating site. My ex was messaging me throughout the day and dropped the bombshell I was meeting someone for a drink that evening. She then told me she was a little jealous but also at the same time was happy for me!

it's important to remember that we all make choices based on the circumstances and the information we have at the time. Back when I rekindled things with my ex, it might have felt like the right decision, even though it turned out to be a mistake in hindsight. The last few days she hasn’t been as talkative towards me now and not mentioning the things she said previously. Perhaps the novelty has worn off with her. However it’s has screwed with my head slightly!

I think it’s the shock that she made contact with me a few weeks ago! It’s been a long time.. and it’s just dug things up again! I’m over thinking a lot of things again. Her distance over the last couple of days is playing on me. Yes perhaps what you’ve said she needed attention and I was there to talk to! I just feel sad and alone! It’s hard to explain how I feel right now..

She does work and so does her husband. But her hours are a lot shorter obviously to take care of the kids!! Yes I did hurt her.. I was in such a big mess back then as my ex was constantly bugging me with messages of how she wanted me back whilst seeing this other girl. It played on my emotions. I took the safer bet and went back! Now I wish I hadn’t but you can’t change the past. I’m 43 now and all I want is to find a life partner to start a family with. Todays modern dating is rubbish. It’s even harder to date and find that special person these days!!

Why would she say to me she’s been thinking about me all of these years?

Hi thanks for your input. She wasn’t a fling. We were together 5 months. That might not seem long enough to get to know someone properly. But have you ever found yourself in a relationship that moves so quickly it feels like you’ve been with them for years? That’s how it felt. No one has ever made me have these feelings before and that deep connection!

I met this amazing person back in 2012. We had such a good connection together. We would hang out all the time, go on random road trips, had amazing sexual chemistry! It was so different with her from all the other girls I’ve dated in the past! I felt she was my soulmate and truly believe this to this day she is! However during that time when meeting her, I had not long split from an ex.. who was still lurking in the background. At that point I told the ex I had met someone new and didn’t want further contact from her. After this I got bombard with texts from her telling me she wanted me back etc. This truly gave me the biggest head *** ever, as I was caught in this love triangle with two women wanting me! The girl who I met became pregnant months after we met with my child but then lost it due to miscarriage. I stupidly went back to the ex! A huge mistake! I spent the last 2/3yrs with her and I was so depressed. I was pining for the other girl every single day and I felt trapped as I couldn’t go back to her as me and the ex moved in together and this other girl eventually met someone else. Fast forward 12 yrs now.. both are married and have kids! I’ve never had a relationship since… I’ve dated but nothing has got to a point to progress into a relationship. I have lived my whole time on regrets and stuck in this continuous cycle that never seems to end! I recently got a message out the blue from the girl I got on so well with. She randomly messaged me on Facebook. She’s still married tho! Anyway we’ve been messaging over the last few weeks and some of the messages are a mixture of every day life, to her saying she has been thinking about me all these years and that she still believes we are soulmates! She even goes on to say she has stalked my social media accounts over the years just to see how I was getting on! We can message away for a hours at a time.. and she mentions she loves speaking with me! During one of the messages I suggested we should meet up one day and catch up. She dropped subtle hints the other day that she was going for a walk and said are you coming down to meet me. So the other night we did whilst her husband was at home with the kids! She was telling me that she still loves me and that our connection was like nothing else. We chatted for a while and she said her husband isn’t like me. He isn’t tactile etc and it seems like he is currently depressed atm due to health issues happening with his parents. I then when on to ask her how they met and she said over the same dating site we had met on. But she then went on to say she didn’t find the attraction straight away with him. But I guess in time she did eventually! she has also mentioned a few times maybe in the future we will be together but she doesn’t want me to put my life on hold if it doesn’t happen. She would however like to try and be friends with me! During our meet, she kept wanting hugs off me! Nothing else happened tho! I know this is very bad… but I still have feelings for her! It’s as if my feelings have resonated which were buried deep inside of me! She is the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. I have so much regrets, as I should have been the person she should have married and had kids with! I’ve always wanted that family unit and now as time is passing I feel I’ll never get that opportunity now! Last couple of days, I feel that she’s distanced her herself a bit. She isn’t saying the same things to me as before. Perhaps I’m overthinking and she’s busy with family life but I am feeling something is up! I’m actually crying on in the inside as I should have been the one who should’ve been married to her and had kids with.