Weight Loss - Retraining Your Feeling Brain

Excerpted from
The 3-Day Solution Plan: Jump-start Lasting Weight Loss by Turning Off the Drive to Overeat [BURST:] Lose up to 6 pounds in 3 days!
By Laurel Mellin, M.A., R.D.

Please recall a time recently when your mind turned to food. You weren't hungry, but you definitely wanted something to oat. Perhaps you were restless, upset, or bored, and you know that you should be dieting-but the food was calling to you.

Chances are that you were in a state we call "below the line." The more moments of the day that we spend below the line, the more our appetites will ramp up.

Every moment of every day, we are in one of two states: above the line or below the line. The Solution Method gives us the tools to stay above the line more of the time, where the drive to overeat naturally fades. We check in with ourselves often, and if we're below the line, we reach for the tools of the method and move ourselves above the line. It's as simple as that!

Every moment of every day,
we're either above the tine or below.

When our feeling brain is overloaded or out of balance, lots of things change. That's because the feeling brain, the limbic system, is the center of many fundamental aspects of our lives. It's the seat of emotional balance, relationship intimacy, spiritual connection, and all those red-hot drives to go to excess, including overeating. When we're below the line, a cascade of changes in neurochemicals and hormones follow. Each imbalance leads to another and taken together, these changes can foster weight gain. The first law of thermodynamics still applies and calories do count. However, the fallout from life below the line triggers cravings and urges to eat more and exercise less. It encourages our bodies to store those extra calories rather than release them.

Are Yon Above or Below the Line?

In Solution groups, the first questions new participants often ask are "What's below the line?" and "How do I know I'm below the line?" The signs are unique to each individual, and you'll develop an awareness of your own particular signs that you are below the line. I know I am when I start wanting food, when I start worrying about everyone else's problems and forget to deal with my own, or when I feel numb or depressed. You'll develop an awareness of your own signposts as you use the 3-Day Solution Plan. But here are some clues to watch for:

Appetites Ramp Up

When we're above the line, the drive to overeat is low, as are other urges and cravings. We don't care about the extra food, don't think about our weight that much, as we are too busy living active, vibrant lives. When we're below the line, we have cravings and urges to eat that we know have nothing whatsoever to do with body hunger. We may think far too much about food and obsess about our weight, or, on the other hand, we may be unaware of our bodies. We don't feel fat even though our weight may pose serious medical risks.

Our appetites for the other common external solutions may ramp up, too. An external solution is anything that we do to excess because we are disconnected from ourselves and the present moment. We can't soothe and comfort ourselves from within, so we do the logical thing. We reach outside ourselves for soothing and comforting.

In the 3-Day Solution Plan, there are 110 judgments about external solutions, and even after you have a Solution 111 your life, you will probably still use them now and then. But you won't judge yourself for it. Plus you don't turn to external solutions that often or for that long.

When we're below the line, our appetites ramp up.

Common external solutions besides overeating are: smoking, drinking, overworking, overspending, using unneeded prescription drugs ("pill popping") or recreational drugs, and the softer excesses such as people pleasing, rescuing others, thinking too much, and isolating. The drives for these common external solutions fade when we're above the line.

We're High, Low, or Numb

Emotionally, when we're above the line, the feelings can be positive or negative and can be intense or mild. They are balanced feelings, such as angry, grateful, sad, happy, afraid, secure, guilty, and proud. One of the things that sets these feelings apart is that they don't spin us out of control. They lead us to our true need rather than our want. They don't stay stuck for hours or days. We feel them, and then they fade and we are open to feeling the next feeling.

When we're above the tine, our appetites fade.

When we're below the line, the feelings can again be positive or negative, but we're either very high or very low. In this state, balanced feelings turn into something else: sadness becomes depression, anger becomes hostility, and fear turns to panic. Simple guilt-a beneficial feeling that leads to learning and change-turns into debilitating shame. Pure happiness becomes such elation that we forget to eat reasonably or pay our light bills. These feelings tend to stay stuck and can last hours, days, or years. They also tend to come with other clues that we are below the line. For example, we can be intensely sad and cry, whereas when the sadness turns to depression, we become passive and withdrawn. When we're intensely angry and above the line, we may stand up for ourselves in an assertive way, but when we're below the line, the anger turns into hostility and we become aggressive.

When we're above the line, we are present in the current moment, experiencing what is occurring in our lives. When we're below the line, the current moment escapes us.