Need a man's opinion !!

[cordelia]

I've posted about this before but I need advice again !

 

There's a guy that I have been friends with for years, and we used to hook up casually with no strings attached. We would go out for dinner and/or drinks and then come back to my place after. Then I wouldn't hear from him for a few weeks before he would initiate getting together again.

 

I finally got sick of this behaviour and avoided contact with him completely for over a year. Then recently we started hanging out again, and then recently we hooked up again for the first time in a really long time ! Now it seems that he is behaving the same way as before, and we have talked about getting together again but he cancelled on me for the 3rd time since that night and I am sooo pissed off now that I just feeling telling him off for good !

 

I have no intention of getting together with him again now, but what I need to know is, what is the best way to tell him how pissed off I am by his behaviour ?

[RayKay]

I am not a guy....but by moving on. You will show him that behaviour is not what you are looking for.

 

And in future....well stay away from him....but make sure you are on same level or same path with someone before sleeping with them. Not saying that having sex early does not sometimes work out...it can, but only generally when there are no expectations from either side and it does just turn out.

[Dako]

It takes two, so maybe you should assign blame equally and lt it go.

You know he's a flake, so why blame him when you go back for more?

[cordelia]

I have actually thought about that too. Its no wonder that he keeps doing this because he obviously thinks that I am okay with it too. But having said that, I have gotten pissed off at him before for cancelling plans with me. Either way though, I've already decided that I am not doing this anymore.

 

That's exactly what I need to know though, do I have the right to be pissed off and say something or should I just walk away quietly without saying a word ?

[fnlyfrei]

If this isn't what you want...hell's yes, you should not even speak to him. I had a guy who treated me this way...and now that I got engaged he suddenly says that he missed the boat and he really loved me but realized it too late. Yeah, sure. What a load of manure. He was a flake...is a flake. Your guy sounds like a flake too. Get some dandruff shampoo and wash the flake right outta your hair. You deserve someone who steps up and is there for you !

[Gus Almighty]

Just tell him that you are sorry but you and he are not looking for the same things. Tell him that you are tired of one night stands and want a true relationship.

 

If he is resistant to what you say then tell him fine, lets go out a few times and see how it goes. But do not have sex with him, make him wait and if you do this you will see what kind of a man he really is and what he wants from you.

 

DO NOT GIVE IN TO SEX

[treefrogkate]

Just wondering how you can call it "no strings attached" when you are obviously putting conditions on the relationship between him and you? Have you talked to him about having an actual relationship (which it seems from what you've written is what you want)? If not, then he is just taking it for what it always has been: sex with absolutely no commitment. If you don't tell him any differently, then whose fault is that?

[HellFrost666]

You said you hook up with him casually with no strings attatched right? Well, it sounds like he is treating it as just that, a casual thing.

 

If it bothers you so much, stop answering his booty calls.

[Karhu]

just say that sex will only come in a commited relationship. so if you want to have sex with me then you need to start dating me and show me that you ar relationship material. otherwise leave me alone, there will be no more booty calls. time to move one.