The new "in thing"

[Vessa]

Something on my mind is bothering the .. heck out of me. Here it is:

 

I'm a college student, so naturally I see a lot of crazy, stupid, and disturbing things. Most things either are to be expected or they're things I'm desensitized to. However, last night a group of girls and guys got together to go party. The girls were dressed up like "hoes," and the guys were "pimps."

 

I keep fuming in my mind: What the ... heck is wrong with these people?

 

Try not to get me wrong, I'm not a strict conservative or something. This isn't a religious issue for me -- it's an ethical one. I'm terrified that guys of my generation are thinking of women (and the women are thinking of themselves) as sex idols or whatever. I've even had my share of events in which guys want nothing more than to get into my pants. AAARRHHH!

 

PLEASE, SOMEONE tell me I'm not nuts.

[jengh]

ugh, I know exactly what you mean. They have pimps and hoes parties all the time here. They're so degrading. It seems like guys LOSE respect for you if you don't sleep with them right away. I know, those guys aren't worht it...but it seems like EVERY guy expects that! It's really irritating. Where did all of the good, moral guys go?

[Dako]

Just kids playing dress-up, no weirder than the phoney gangstas keepin it real in the burbs.

[Blackhawk2009]

yea i kno what you mean, i think that sounds really stupid and ive never even seen that happen before in my college, i guess im lucky. But yea ive noticed that some girls (not all) like to be degraded to nothing but the garbage on the bottom of your shoe. I just find it funny that they are attracted to guys that treat them like a possession rather than someone who is supposed to care about them and treat them like they would like to be treated.

[itsallgrand]

You aren't nuts.

 

You have a different idea of fun than they do, I guess.

 

Some people take dress-up too seriously, yeah, and will take advantage of the opportunity to let their inner character fly.

 

For others it might just be fun. Like Halloween. There sure seem to be a lot of variations of 'hoe' during Halloween.... But it can be rather harmless.

[Vessa]

But it can be rather harmless.

I suppose...

 

I think I realize why I find this so offensive to me. They're "making fun" of something that isn't funny at all. I think someone who's been a sex slave/prostitute/raped wouldn't have the same idea. It's mocking. I'm sure if these girls really submitted themselves to that sort of thing, they wouldn't be laughing, either.

[musicguy]

yea i kno what you mean, i think that sounds really stupid and ive never even seen that happen before in my college, i guess im lucky. But yea ive noticed that some girls (not all) like to be degraded to nothing but the garbage on the bottom of your shoe. I just find it funny that they are attracted to guys that treat them like a possession rather than someone who is supposed to care about them and treat them like they would like to be treated.

 

right on, I agree.

[jengh]

yea i kno what you mean, i think that sounds really stupid and ive never even seen that happen before in my college, i guess im lucky. But yea ive noticed that some girls (not all) like to be degraded to nothing but the garbage on the bottom of your shoe. I just find it funny that they are attracted to guys that treat them like a possession rather than someone who is supposed to care about them and treat them like they would like to be treated.

 

I need to meet a guy like you.

[itsallgrand]

I don't much care for it either.

It reminds me, ya know this bunch of college kids doing it, of that old upper-class hobby of 'slumming it' in certain communities.

It's a joke to them, but there is a reality to it for real people that isn't very nice.

 

The nice thing is though that once you see how it offends you, you can choose not to be offended. It can actually be rather funny, because it's pretty ridiculous!

 

Like Dako mentioned, like seeing 'homefry' financing his jeans and 'pimp-mobile' with his allowance from mommy and daddy. Ridiculous.

[Blue Skittles]

i find that a lot at the bars out here. The girls are dressed pretty skanky and they will go and sleep with a guy they just met that night. I just can't believe how many girls disresepect themselves that much to go do that.

[HyruleGuardian]

yea i kno what you mean, i think that sounds really stupid and ive never even seen that happen before in my college, i guess im lucky. But yea ive noticed that some girls (not all) like to be degraded to nothing but the garbage on the bottom of your shoe. I just find it funny that they are attracted to guys that treat them like a possession rather than someone who is supposed to care about them and treat them like they would like to be treated.

 

Definitely agree with that. I don't understand why girls usually seem to go with the trouble makers and the guys that treat them like dirt. It just doesn't make sense to me.

[applepie]

I went to one of those parties once (I didn't dress up) and even the guys dressed up as prostitutes. It was hilarious.

 

I honestly think it's just harmless fun. Some people love to dress up for theme nights. I don't think you all need to take it so seriously. If you don't want to go to these parties then you can just decline the invite.

[itsallgrand]

I went to one of those parties once (I didn't dress up) and even the guys dressed up as prostitutes. It was hilarious.

 

As male or female prostitutes?

 

Maybe the next one I see I'll dress up as a male prostitute for it. Gonna need some duct tape and socks.

[Scout]

Vessa, I cannot recommend this book enough if you're looking for insight into this phenomenon (not just the pimps and hoes parties, but the general trend of women hypersexualizing themselves): link removed

[Vessa]

Thank you to everyone who replied. To those who agree with me, thanks for assuring me that I'm not the only one who considers this repulsive.

 

To those who say it's harmless, I believe that dressing up and "roleplaying" in itself won't harm anyone. It's the so-called "side effects" I worry about. What other people think. All in all, I just can't understand why they choose such horrible subjects -- things that are repulsive. Why not pirates? Ghosts? Yetis? Of course, I'm sure pop culture, the media, etc. etc. have an effect. The girls who attended the party often listen to rap music that includes mention of... well, you get the idea.

 

Everyone has their own free will to do as they wish. As long as they don't directly harm me, then so be it. However, when guys start walking up to me with the same expectations that I'm racey or whatever (which is an odd conclusion since I do NOT wear skimpy clothes), then I start to get annoyed to all ... heck.

 

And thank you, Scout. Whenever something bothers me a lot, I have the habit of reading up on the subject. I'll definitely look into that book.

[Scout]

And thank you, Scout. Whenever something bothers me a lot, I have the habit of reading up on the subject. I'll definitely look into that book.

 

It's a really interesting book for anyone to read, even if they decide they don't agree with the book's main premise...which is that women are, in some ways, acting raunchy in an attempt to be "one of the guys." It's kind of a misguided approach to leveling out the playing ground between the sexes...women are acting like sexual braggarts, thinking that will make guys respect them and think of them as an "equal"...however, what they're actually doing is undoing all the work of past feminist movements. Even though some of today's so-called feminist movements are calling this new raunchiness "sexual empowerment."

 

That's the book's premise, anyway. Again, I think it's a fascinating read.

[Gunmetal]

Wow Scout, I hadn't heard of that book. It looks really interesting; I think I will pick it up.

[Scout]

Wow Scout, I hadn't heard of that book. It looks really interesting; I think I will pick it up.

 

I have recommended this book more than any other in the past two years. To be honest, I recognized a bit of my own behavior, and that of friends, in the book. Not so much how I am now, but in the past. For me, at least, the book connected the dots into why we acted in certain ways from time to time. And why females are hypersexualizing themselves more and more these days.

[pianoguy]

I think you're completely sane, and I agree completely that it isn't harmless fun.

 

But if it makes you feel better, I think there are a lot more people than you realize who are more like you, i.e., more mature, more self-respecting. It took me a few years to find them, but by the time I was a junior I had a large group of friends from accross campus that I felt were mature and people with depth to their character.